The Right Road Lost
by zpplnchick
Summary: After a car accident, Hyde wakes up to a twisted version of reality he comes to find is actual hell and with no memory of how he got there, a hell that Jackie's been living in for the past few months. Set during Season 8, shortly after "Sweet Lady".
1. Chapter 1

**Summary**: After a car accident, Hyde wakes up to a twisted version of reality he comes to find is actual hell and with no memory of how he got there, a hell that Jackie's been living in for the past few months. Set during Season 8, shortly after "Sweet Lady.

**Disclaimer**: I don't own this show, because if I did, this story wouldn't be necessary to fix the _actual hell_ that was Season 8.

**Rating**: The gang's potty mouths make this worthy of an **M **rating. What can I say? Hell is shitty; ain't no way around it.

**Author's Note**: I had the idea for this back in 2011 and just never had any clue where to go with it. Honestly, the edges are still a little warbled, but I'm itching to see where it goes. Join me :) Also, I have to warn you guys. I haven't actually watched Season 8 fully, just a couple of clips and the finale. Anything else is plain ol' torture. I'm basing my knowledge on other stories I've read that talk about it some and episode summaries from Wikipedia. Please forgive me if I get some details wrong.

The title is from the opening lines of _Dante's Inferno_:

_Midway on our life's journey, I found myself  
>In dark woods, the right road lost. To tell<br>About those woods is rough-so tangled and hard..._

Like I said. Season 8 is hell.

* * *

><p><em>He remembered the smell of her hair and the small pout of her lip as she looked at him. He remembered thinking how right she always felt when he held her, but ultimately he remembered how shitty it felt to be second best to Kelso. Again.<em>

_o-o-o_

_February 14, 1978_

_4:23 p.m._

"_So, that's your story? It didn't mean anything?"_

"_Right! Right, so…so, you just need to get over it."_

"_Oh. Yeah, don't worry. I'm over it." He folded his arms in front of his chest, a secondary barrier against her, and pulled his face into indifference. "In fact, I'm over you."_

_Her face froze for a second before realization dawned on her. "Wait, Steven. What are you saying?"_

_He vaguely heard Fez clarify his words for her, so busy was he focusing on the change in her delicate features, the hurt that entered her gaze as she looked at him. That look tore him up then, but little did he know it was nothing compared to the defeated sadness she would fix him with much, much later. _

"_Steven?"_

_He shrugged and watched her turn and run out the room. He forced his heart to slow down and sit calmly on the sofa, determined to give nothing away. _

_o-o-o_

_Later, she turned his world upside down—again—with those three little words he never knew he needed to hear._

* * *

><p>February 10, 1979<p>

8:44 p.m.

His head was pounding and a deep groan escaped his dry, chapped lips. He felt like he was suffering from the world's worst hangover, only he couldn't remember drinking anything at all the previous night. Was he hungover?

Shit. It felt like he was.

But something wasn't right. His cot was too soft, too flat. And it smelled different. Sterile.

Slowly, Hyde cracked open his eyes and emitted another groan at the harsh light, realizing then that he wasn't on the cot in the basement. He was in a bed, and a hospital bed by the looks of it.

"Hyde!" Donna shouted when she heard his second groan and ran over to his side. "You're awake! Oh, my god. How do you feel? Well, why the hell would I ask that, right? I mean, you probably feel pretty crappy. I've never been in a car crash, but I can imagine it doesn't feel good waking up from one."

Hyde groaned again before licking his dry, chapped lips. "Car crash?"

"Yeah, don't you… do you not remember it?"

Tiredly, Hyde looked up at her from his position on the bed.

"Shit. Let me go get the nurse or somebody."

"Wait."

She turned quickly, her look expectant.

"Hand me that cup, will you?"

"Oh, right. The nurse said you'd probably be thirsty, what with all the meds and stuff. Here."

"Thanks," he said softly, taking a long sip from the straw, before nodding at her. "You can go do what you were gonna do."

"Oh, right. Okay, I'll be right back."

She walked out quickly, making sure to not slam the door behind her. Hyde looked around the room and grimaced. He hated hospitals, always had. They were too white, too clean. He spotted Kelso asleep on the couch across from the room, drool seeping onto the armrest his head was laying on.

"Kelso. Hey, Kelso!"

He jerked awake. "Wha—? Nobody touches the bunnies! Wait…where am I?"

Hyde rolled his eyes. "In the hospital. Now my turn. What the hell happened?"

"Oh," Kelso said around a yawn, rubbing his eyes tiredly. "You're up. Finally. How do you feel?"

"Like shit. Man, tell me what the hell I'm doing here."

"You don't remember. Yeah, the doctor mentioned something about that. You were in a car crash. It was pretty bad."

"Anyone else hurt?"

"No, you were the only one. Mrs. Forman went ballistic when the nurse said that made you lucky. Of course, she started crying the second she saw you, so I doubt she saw any of this as lucky. She yelled at the chick and said she wanted a new nurse, one who knew how to talk to a patient's family." Kelso laughed. "You should have seen the look on Mrs. Forman's face when the nurse said that technically we weren't family, according to your chart. Oh, W.B. was here but he had to go back to work. He said he'd come by again later."

Hyde nodded. "The accident, was it that bad?"

"Sorta, yeah. It happened yesterday morning. You were driving to meet the Formans and Donna…umm…somewhere. I guess a kid was on his bike in the middle of the road and you swerved and missed him but slammed right into a brick wall. The kid's okay. And somehow the Camino's fine but that wall isn't. They said you hit your head on the steering wheel and blacked out immediately. There was some swelling, which I guess is why you've been out this whole time."

"What time is it?"

"Almost nine at night."

"Damn." Hyde nodded and looked around the room, finally noticing how quiet it was. Something was missing.

"Where is she?"

"Who? Mrs. Forman?"

If Hyde could have punched him, he would have. "No, moron, my girl."

Kelso paused at the concern he heard in his friend's voice. He hadn't realized Hyde cared so much about the leggy blonde. "Oh, she's down at the cafeteria with Fez."

"Oh. Figured she would have been here shoving flowers and chocolate in my face or something."

Kelso looked at him funny. "Flowers? That doesn't seem like her. But I guess you know her more than the rest of us." He shrugged and sat back on the couch. "The whole thing pretty much tore us up but she was pretty calm throughout it all. I'm sure she'll be happy to see you're okay though."

Something wasn't right. Nothing of what Kelso said matched up with what he… hell, what _everyone_ knew about Jackie. Calm? Never.

"Well, can you go get her? Chocolate or not, I wanna see my girlfriend."

Kelso, still tired, had rested his head back against the couch. But at Hyde's words, he slowly lifted back up and looked at Hyde in confusion. "Girlfriend? You mean your wife?"

"Wife… I married her?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, it shocked all of us, but yeah. You don't remember?"

"No. But I guess I would have done it anyway."

"I thought you said it was a spur of the moment thing. How would you have 'done it anyway'?"

"What the hell are you talking about? You were there. You knew how hard up she was about getting married. I mean, I didn't think it would happen this quickly, but it was bound to. Don't tell her I forgot though. She'd kill me."

"Don't get mad at me for saying this, but I don't actually think Sam would mind."

Hyde opened his eyes and looked at Kelso, expecting a goofy smile but seeing nothing but confusion. "Sam? Who the hell is Sam? I'm talking about Jackie, Kelso. You know, the 95 pound brunette you keep trying to steal from me?"

Kelso stood very still, his eyes growing rounder as something—a really, really bad feeling—hit him in the gut. Something was definitely not right here.

The doc said that other than a little memory loss and a couple of fractures, Hyde would be fine. He might not remember the accident but that's it.

_This_ was definitely not a little memory loss.

"What's the last thing you remember, man?"

Hyde sighed and leaned his head back against his pillow, closing his eyes. "Me and Jackie beat out Forman and Donna as Betsy's godparents and they got really pissed. I guess there's some stuff between now and then if I've actually married her though. Damn. I really didn't think that would happen for a while. A couple of years at least."

Slowly, Kelso backed up towards the doorway. "Uhh, let me just go grab someone. I'll be right back." He turned quickly and almost ran into Donna.

"Hey, the nurse is busy but she'll be here in a se—whoa. Kelso!"

Kelso, not stopping, immediately grabbed Donna's arm and pulled her behind him out of the hospital room. "Nurse isn't good enough," he said to her, his voice low as the door shut softly behind him. "We need the doctor. Now."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: Please review and let me know what you think! Second chapter will be up soon. I know I'm most likely taking some serious liberties with the memory loss stuff, but in fiction, anything is possible. Right?


	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note**: Yay! I'm so glad people are interested in seeing where this goes Me too. Now, I've already gotten reviews accusing me of being completely unoriginal and boring, but also of plagiarizing. So, I wanted to address some of that here. Anyone just wanting to read, please skip ahead!

Firstly, memory loss is a trope. It's going to be popular in _everything_. And I'm using the car accident thing, like I'm sure many have before me, because it's common and relatable. It's why we have to pay so much for insurance…because it happens all the damn time. Secondly, if you don't like the plot of this story, I have a pretty simple solution: quit whining, stop reading, and write your own damn story. Thirdly—and this one I feel strongly about—I work in publishing. I understand incredibly well the damage of plagiarism, which is why I don't condone it. I didn't steal this story from someone else, no matter what anyone may think. This is coming out of my own head and being transcribed onto my own computer to put up on my own account.

* * *

><p>February 10, 1979<p>

9:35 p.m.

"You gotta do it. You promised her."

"I know, but… damnit, that was before when we were all just worried about those damn fractures and the whole brain swelling thing from the bump on his head. This is _not_ just a bump on the head, Fez! He doesn't even remember Chicago! What the hell am I supposed to tell her?"

"The truth."

Donna's shoulders dropped and she turned to look at Red solemnly, knowing he was right.

"She needs to know the truth," he continued. "And so does he."

"I have to tell _both_ of them?!"

"No, honey," Mrs. Forman cut in, placing a comforting hand on Donna's shoulder. "Red and I can take care of Steven. You take care of Jackie, okay? She deserves nothing less."

Donna took a deep breath, unable to argue. Knowing how shitty the past few months have been for Jackie, Donna partly to blame, she knew Mrs. Forman was right. Jackie really didn't deserve anything less. "Right. Okay. The truth." She stood up and walked towards the payphone, fingering the dime in her hand and trying to figure out how the hell she was going to tell Jackie how Hyde really was without completely freaking her out.

That might be a stretch. She was definitely gonna freak out no matter what Donna said.

Another deep breath to calm her nerves and Donna picked up the receiver, dialing the number to Jackie and Fez's apartment.

Of course, she picked up on the first ring.

"_Donna? What happened? Is he okay? Is he awake yet?"_

"I… umm, yeah. He's awake. He's fine…physically."

"_Physically? What the hell does that mean?" _A gasp. _"He hasn't gone crazy, has he? Michael mentioned the swelling. He's not like drooling or anything, is he? Oh, god! Is he gonna have to get transferred to the crazy ward?"_

"No, he's definitely not going to get transferred to the crazy ward."

"_Well, what is it?"_

"He…uhh…"

"_Spit it out, you lumberjack!"_

"He's in some pain, but he's okay."

"_Okay… and you were hedging around to tell me that because…?"_

Deep breath, then, "He doesn't remember anything, Jackie."

"_What, about the accident? That's normal, right? With the trauma and the drugs… right?"_

"No. He doesn't remember anything from the past few months."

"…_what?"_

"Mr. and Mrs. Forman are about to go tell him the truth now, but he doesn't remember anything past Kelso naming you guys as Betsy's godparents. He thinks I haven't been in to see him for the past half an hour because I'm still mad that Eric and I weren't chosen. I just can't… I don't know what to say."

"_Oh, god."_

"Kelso and the nurse are in there with him now, keeping him occupied for the time being. The doctor's gonna come around in a second and inform Mr. and Mrs. Forman about how to tell him everything."

Silence.

"Jackie…he keeps asking for you. He thinks you guys are…"

"_Oh, my god. He thinks we're still together."_

"Yeah."

"_What…umm…what about her? Has he seen her yet?"_

Donna sighed. "No. Kelso and I were there when he woke up. And since he doesn't even know who she is, they said she shouldn't be in to see him yet. Not until the Formans talk to him. So, she took off."

"_She took off?"_

Donna heard the edge in Jackie's voice but didn't say anything. Hell, it mirrored her own feelings on the matter. "Yeah. Said she was hungry and craving pancakes," Donna said, practically growling the last part.

"_God." _Silence, and then, "_Well…uhh…thanks for telling me._" Donna closed her eyes at the tremor in Jackie's voice. _"I have to go. Umm, Donna?"_

"Yeah."

"_Let me know if he gets worse or when he gets out, but please don't tell me how he reacts."_

Donna nodded. "Okay. I'm sorry, Jackie."

"_Yeah, me too. Just going to have to do this all over again, I guess."_

At the click of Jackie hanging up, Donna slowly set the receiver back on the hook, not moving otherwise. The past few months without Eric and Kelso had been hard enough, but the tension between Hyde and Jackie had been next to unbearable. With Hyde's condition, that tension might be gone, but who knows what the hell they were all about to get into when he found out what's been going on the past...god, was it really eight months? How were they going to explain eight months to him?

She knew from the nurses that Hyde's calmness and acceptance of his supposed marriage to Jackie were really his reaction to all the pain medication. When it wore off, or when he got the full story in a couple of minutes, they were told he might react differently.

Or he might not actually be that freaked out about Jackie as his wife, and that's what made Donna nervous. Would he try and get her back when he found out they were no longer together? Or would he embrace Sam, setting them all back to life after Chicago?

And Jackie… shit. Donna hung her head, letting it hit the top of the payphone. There was a lot she didn't feel good about, that she regretted, since Eric got on that plane: letting him go without at least trying to go with him, everything with Randy and knowing how wrong it all felt, and befriending that vapid blonde bitch Hyde brought home. But mostly it was the shitty way she'd been treating Jackie that gnawed at the hole in her gut.

Sure, Donna could play off the excuse that befriending Sam had been out of politeness towards a new member of the group, but that was bullshit. Eric leaving to Africa had left Donna feeling empty, and instead of sucking it up and taking comfort in the other empty person of the group—Jackie—she'd taken the easy way out and betrayed her.

She'd remembered how good it felt to make fun of Jackie from the old days and fell back on old habits, squashing that niggling part of her brain that told her denying Jackie's ability to express her pain was wrong.

Donna heard someone come up to her and knew immediately who it was: the only person Jackie had really been able to confide in since this hell started.

"Donna," Fez said quietly, laying a hand on her shoulder.

"I really messed up, didn't I?"

He was quiet for a second. "You can fix it now though."

Donna turned towards him. "You know, in all this time, I never asked. I never really thought to… how is she? Really?"

Fez looked down. "Struggling. She feels abandoned." He shrugged. "Can you blame her?"

"I just… I was so upset after Eric left, I didn't think I had it in me to feel sorry for her too."

Fez smiled softly. "I know."

"So I pushed her away, laughing at her along the way with Hyde's slutty wife who turns out to be a real piece of shit."

"You were hurting. She gets that."

"Yeah, but I didn't let myself get that she was hurting too. I could have done better."

"Honey?"

Donna turned towards Mrs. Forman's voice and saw her standing with Red and the doctor.

"We're going in. We can update you if you need to be somewhere. Or for someone."

Donna huffed a small laugh, wiping away her sudden tears. "Okay. Thanks, Mrs. Forman. You'll call us when you're done?"

The Formans nodded. "We will," Red said before grabbing Kitty's hand and following the doctor into the room.

Donna watched them go, speaking quietly. "You know what really worries me?"

"What?"

"His reaction to marriage with Jackie."

Fez shrugged. "They said that was just cause of all the drugs."

Donna nodded before turning to him. "Or what if it's not? What if that's actually how he feels about it…calm? What if all the drugs did was take away his inhibitions?"

Fez sighed. "Then things just got a lot more complicated."

Donna huffed a laugh. "Yeah. And the Formans are about to spring hell on him. Hey, does she…umm…does she know?"

"Jackie?" Fez asked, getting a nod from Donna. "Know what?"

"Where Hyde was going when he got in his accident?"

Fez looked down at the floor before slowly shaking his head. "No. He didn't want me to tell her. Said Jackie had nothing to do with it. Now, I'm not so sure."

"Shit," Donna muttered. "I have to tell her that too, don't I?"

Fez looked at her. "I…don't know if that's such a good idea right now."

"No, but Mrs. Forman was right. She deserves the truth, right?"

Fez looked towards Hyde's room before slowly nodding. "Yeah, she does."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: Happy Thanksgiving, everyone! Hope y'all are enjoying your fill of turkey and mashed potatoes.

Just a quick note on the timeline of this; this is set around five-ish months after the debacle in Chicago (eight months of his memory missing, considering the Betsy godparent thing was just before Jackie's high school graduation, which would have been around mid-June), technically making it February of 1979. As you can see from the flashback in the first chapter though, only a "year" has passed since Jackie first told Hyde she loved him, which we all know is bull since those two were together for three seasons. So, the only way to make this work is set this story in 1979 and pretend that 1978 was a very _loooong_ year. *Shrugs*


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note**: Enjoy :) Since the four day weekend will be over tomorrow, these updates won't be coming this quickly. But rest assured I am writing constantly. Inspiration has hit and I'm runnin' with it!

* * *

><p>February 10, 1979<p>

9:30 p.m.

"You met her at a concert? That's so cute!"

Kelso grinned as he pulled out a picture of Betsy while Hyde grimaced from the bed. He'd been trying to get some answers out of the both of them—anyone, really—for the past half an hour but nobody would budge. 20 minutes of yammering and all Kelso would talk about were Brooke, Betsy, and Bunnies, all aided greatly by the nurse who kept asking him question after question and not letting Hyde get a word in edgewise.

And he was getting sick of it. "Hey!" he shouted, finally getting their attention. "Both of you. Will you shut up about Playboy Bunnies and tell me what the hell is going on here? Why won't anyone tell me anything?"

"I'm sorry, sir. I've been instruct—"

"Dude," Kelso cut in, smiling at the nurse in apology. "A lot of crap has happened, okay? But we're not the ones who should be telling you. The Formans will be in in a second and let you in on everything."

Hyde sighed, unsatisfied but knowing that's all he was gonna get for now. "Fine. As you were."

As the nurse and Kelso started up again, Hyde leaned his head back on the pillow, trying to fight off the oncoming headache. Nothing made sense, especially with what he'd learned from Kelso's yammering. All he knew was that Kelso lived in Chicago with Brooke and Betsy, working at a Playboy club.

Hyde also knew there was some weird significance to Chicago, what with the weighted way Kelso said it when he first told him—as if he was afraid Hyde was gonna get up and frog him at the very mention of the city. Hyde searched his mind, trying to think of anything that could make Kelso react like that, but nothing.

And he really couldn't figure out why he wasn't allowed to see his chick. _That_ really made no sense. Hospitals don't let wives see their husbands anymore but Kelso can come in and out of his room? What kind of stupid shit is that?

At the thought of Jackie as his wife, Hyde smiled, imagining the argument that lead up to that decision. He knew it would have had to been a big one, and she'd had to have been very persuasive to get him to cave. No biggie though. Apparently he worked through his crap enough for him to say "I do" and for her to promise never to leave him. Good enough for him.

At that thought, the door to his room opened and the doctor walked in, followed by the Formans, hand-in-hand. Seeing them was a huge relief…until he saw the looks on their faces. It looked like he was about to get his answers.

Mrs. Forman began tearing up the second she saw him, running over and hugging him very tightly until he groaned in pain.

"Oh! I'm so sorry, Steven. It's just…" She reached up and wiped away her tears. "It's just so good to see you up. We were all so worried."

Hyde smiled. "Thanks, Mrs. Forman." He looked over and saw Red talking with the doctor and the nurse, stepping aside as Kelso went to leave the room.

"Why won't anyone tell me anything?" he asked.

Mrs. Forman smiled as she sat on the edge of his bed, patting his hand. "You'll get your answers, honey, but it would help if you explained exactly what it is you remember last."

Hyde sighed, frustrated, but thought back. "Okay. Fez got kicked out so you suggested he and Kelso look for an apartment together. Forman and Donna were pissed that Kelso chose me and Jackie as Betsy's godparents. Jackie and I celebrated and she gave me a list of everything she wanted for her graduation present. I remember arguing with her that she only gets one thing but she didn't like that. Anyway, I got it—her present—and just got back from the mall to give it to her 'cause I knew she'd want it early."

Mrs. Forman nodded, smiling at him. "Okay, that's a good start." She turned around. "Red, honey?"

Red nodded towards her before shaking the doctor's hand and showing them out. Once he sat down, Kitty spoke again.

"Okay, well that—what you last remember—was about eight months ago."

Hyde's eyebrows shot up and he expelled a loud breath before nodding. "Okay." At Red and Kitty's expectant looks, he continued. "Well, I mean, I knew it had to be a good chunk of time if Jackie and I are married, but eight months is a while.

Red and Kitty exchanged a quick glance.

"That's the other thing, Steven," Red said, his voice low but his eyes trained on Hyde. "It isn't Jackie you're married to."

Adrenaline began pumping through Hyde's blood again, alerting the nursing staff who were carefully monitoring his heart, which now beat erratically. A nurse in a crisp white uniform came in, heading directly towards the monitor beeping. "Everything okay here?"

Kitty nodded. "Yes, everything's fine. Thank you."

The nurse nodded before turning towards Hyde. "I can give you a small sedative if you feel you're getting anxious. It'll help calm you down."

Hyde answered, but never took his eyes off Red. "No. Thanks. I don't want more meds."

The nurse nodded once more and left the room.

"What do you mean," Hyde said, his voice low and angry, "I'm not married to Jackie? Who the hell am I married to then?"

"Her name is Samantha," Kitty said, cutting in. She reached up and put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "You met her in Las Vegas about five months ago. She's a…stripper."

If they were anyone else, Hyde would have told them to quit messing with him and tell him the goddamn truth already. But he knew these people. They were _his_ people. They were good and they were honest and they would never lie to him. And if nothing else, the grave look in Red's eyes said it all: they were telling him the absolute truth and Red knew it was all kinds of fucked up. Hyde prayed to anyone that was listening that his marriage had nothing to do with a kid whose mother wasn't Jackie. A wife _and _child definitely weren't on his radar—eight months down the line or not.

Hyde shut his eyes and blew out a deep breath. "Okay, start from the beginning and tell me everything." He opened his eyes and looked at them carefully. "I mean it. I want to know every damn thing."

o-o-o

February 10, 1979

10:04 p.m.

"Jackie?" Donna called out as soon as she unlocked the apartment door and stepped inside. Since everyone had a key to the basement, it made sense for everyone to have keys to everyone else's apartments and houses, with the understanding that you don't just barge into someone's home, especially ones with parents.

They'd gotten into trouble with that before.

Donna pocketed her keys and stepped inside, shutting and locking the door behind her. "Jackie, you here?"

"Donna?" Jackie called from the bathroom before stepping out, her face freshly washed and clean of makeup.

Donna could see she'd been crying, her eyes red and slightly puffy. "Hey, I came over to hang out with you awhile."

"What? No. You're my source of updates. How am I gonna know what's going on with you here?"

Donna smiled. "Someone will call us with news. I made sure of it."

Jackie rolled her eyes and walked back into the bathroom. "Whatever. If we miss out on anything, it'll be your fault, goon."

"Understood. Hey, are you okay?"

"What this?" Jackie said, waving towards her face. "I'll be okay. I just…" She stopped with her hands bracing the sink and her head down. Tremors followed soon after.

The first thing Donna noticed was that these were definitely not like the big, loud, showboat tears she was used to. There was no whining, no screaming, and Jackie wasn't immediately running into her arms like she usually would. They were very quiet but incredibly violent with big, fat tears rolling down her cheeks. "Jackie…"

"What am I gonna do, Donna? I don't think I can do this all over again."

Yup. Fez wasn't kidding before. Jackie definitely wasn't okay. How could she have missed this? And for so long? Damn, it had been five months since Hyde came back from Vegas with a wife in tow. What had Donna been doing all this time?

She walked towards the small brunette and wrapped her in her arms, and only then was it that Jackie made a sound—a strangled, grieving cry that made Donna tear up too. "I'm sorry, Jackie."

"I just…I don't understand," Jackie replied in a whisper around her tears. "He gets a free pass, the slate totally wiped clean, while I have to go on knowing everything? Knowing about how we broke up and the skanky whore and how much of a jerk he's been?" She gasped. "What if he wants to get back together? I don't know how I can forgive him for all the cruel crap he's been slinging at me all this time, let alone have to explain why I can't. He'll try to apologize," she said quietly, more tears falling down. "He'll try to apologize 'cause he figures I'll take him back 'cause he knows how much I love him…but I'll have to break his heart. I don't wanna break his heart, Donna."

Donna closed her eyes, letting more tears escape. "I'll be here, okay? Me and Fez and Kelso know what's been goin' on and we'll be here. You're not alone anymore."

"Okay," Jackie said, muffled against Donna's sweater. She reared back quickly, back to angry. "Ugh, I just don't get it. It's so unfair. I wish I could go back and superglue him to his seat or something so he wouldn't be able to leave and go wherever the hell he was going when he got in the accident. Plus, it would ruin his jeans, so that's good too."

Donna felt her heart beat speed up and the blood rushed into her ears. She knew that if she were gonna tell Jackie, this would be the moment to do it, but she was afraid of how Jackie would react. Donna herself wasn't totally sure Hyde was being totally honest when he told Fez that it had nothing to do with the tiny brunette. Opening this can of worms on top of everything else could lead to chaos.

Donna closed her eyes and the word _truth_ popped up like a mantra in her head. _Truth. Truth. Truth_. _TruthTruthTruthTruthTruth_. "Uhh…Jackie, another thing."

"Yeah? What is it?" Jackie said as she sat on the edge of the bathtub, running the water and feeling the temperature with her fingers.

"Uhhh…"

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: Update coming soon & please review!


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note**: Thank you, everyone, for the lovely words of encouragement and intrigue! I appreciate all of it :)

* * *

><p>February 10, 1979<p>

9:13 p.m.

The last few chords of Coltrane's _Naima_ filled the air of an opulent office, the sax streaming smoothly from a record player near the window on the far end of the room. A well-dressed man, the last in the building save for the cleaning crew, sat at his desk and worked quickly and quietly. He paused and waited through the seconds of silence as the needle moved towards the next track, expecting the lively beginning of _Mr. P.C._, and jumped at the sudden harsh ringing of the telephone that came instead. He cursed and sighed before laughing at himself in amusement and reached over to pick up the receiver quickly, effectively shutting off the obnoxious sound.

"William Barnett."

"_William. Hi. Red here. He's just woken up."_

W.B. breathed a deep sigh. "Thank God. How is he? Is he talking yet?"

"_Yes, he is. Though you should come here as soon as you can. He's suffered some memory loss."_

W.B. tilted his head in confusion. "Memory loss? Oh, god. You mean amnesia?"

"_Exactly. The doctor said it would have been hard to gauge, which is why it's a surprise."_

"Damn," cursed W.B. in a low voice. That boy never got a break. "How long? The memory?"

"_Eight months. His last memories are from around early June."_

"Good God." W.B. thought back, trying to remember what was going on around that time. It felt like a lifetime ago. "Okay, I'll be there as soon as I can. Thanks, Red."

"_Anytime. Kitty and I will be going in soon to tell him everything. Just let us know when you're here—I know he'll want to talk to you as soon as possible."_

"You've got it. I'm on my way."

W.B. hung up and sighed before picking up the receiver again and dialing quickly.

"_Hello?"_

"Angie, honey. I've just heard from Red. He's awake."

o-o-o

February 10, 1979

10:35 p.m.

_Ding_.

The elevator doors opened and W.B. was the first to walk out, impatient to get around the stragglers of visitors who hadn't had the chance to learn the very ins and outs of this floor the past two days. He walked confidently down the hall and took two rights, heading directly towards his son's hospital room. Noticing the door shut, a rarity since Steven had been admitted since he had so many visitors coming in and out, W.B. looked down the hallway for a familiar face, spotting two—both sleeping in uncomfortable-looking chairs.

He made his way towards the closest.

"Son…" W.B. said while shaking the boy's shoulder. "Hey, son!"

"Mmm…candy…" the boy mumbled under his breath.

W.B. was just about to start again but stopped at the boy's next words. "Mmm…candy…candied boobs…mmm."

He backed up slowly, deciding to leave that one alone, and turned towards the other. "Hey, son. Wake up, now. Someone needs to tell me how my Steven is doing." He shook the boy's shoulder harder. "Come on now!"

Kelso jumped awake and let out a small scream at the close proximity of W.B.'s face before giggling his fears away. "Oh, hey, man. Good. You're here."

W.B. let out a small smile. "How's he doing? They still in there?"

"Yeah. It's been a while." Kelso glanced up at the clock in the hallway. "Almost an hour. You should go in."

W.B. knocked twice before opening the door, worried when the first sound he heard was a woman crying.

"Oh, Steven, I'm so sorry. We thought you might have been unhappy and we did nothing!"

"No, Mrs. Forman…man, please stop crying."

"Kitty. Don't blame yourself. We did what we could when she first showed up. Remember? He chose…oh, William." Red got up and walked towards Steven's father.

"How's he doing?" W.B. asked quietly, eyeing Kitty and Steven as the two continued talking.

Red breathed a deep sigh and shrugged a shoulder. "He's not taking the news so well."

"Is it about the girl?" W.B. asked, remembering the busty blonde Steven had introduced him to around Christmas time.

Red nodded sagely. "Yup. And the bimbo that came after her."

W.B. shut his eyes in understanding. "Ahh." _Wrong girl_.

"I'm going to take Kitty home. You good here?"

"Yeah. Thanks again, Red." W.B. walked over and gave a brief hug to Kitty before sitting down in the vacant chair next to his son's bed. "It's good to see you awake."

Hyde nodded, a frown present as he thought over everything revealed in the past hour.

"How you holding up?"

Hyde scrubbed his face with his hand, groaning slightly. "Not great, man. I gotta tell you—life's not turning out how I thought it would. I mean…shit. It feels like two days ago I was happy. Now? Swimming in a sea of crap and no idea how I got here."

"I hear you. But you did get here."

"So it still counts?"

W.B. smiled. "Of course it does, son. You made your choices and now you have to live with them."

"That's reassuring."

"Look, Steven. I know I wasn't able to give you any fatherly advice growing up, but I can give you some now. If you don't like your reality, change it."

"That easy, huh?"

W.B. paused and waited for Hyde to look at him. "No," he said when Hyde finally did. "No, it isn't. That's why they say you have to work for what you want. Because it's true. I mean, take me. I wasn't born rich. I wasn't handed the chain or any of my nice things. I knew what I wanted so I busted my ass until I got it. Now it's your turn. Just think of this as a wake-up call. It's not too late to fix everything and swim out of that sea of crap."

Hyde nodded and leaned his head back, eyeing the ceiling tiles, before turning to W.B. with a smirk. "Does this mean you'll give me some time off?"

For the first time in two days, W.B. grinned. "You can do whatever you want to, Steven. It's your store."

Hyde's left eyebrow rose slowly in interest. "What about Angie?"

"She's in Milwaukee helping me run the corporate office. Just make sure the store's staffed and we don't get robbed."

Hyde nodded once. "That I can do."

"Good," W.B. said as he started to get up. "I have to get home. I have an early day tomorrow. When are they letting you out?"

"They're gonna keep me overnight."

"Well, get some rest. Call me when you've settled in to your new life so you, me and Angie can have dinner. And call me if you need anything."

"Thanks, man."

"And remember. If you don't like what you see…change it."

Hyde nodded and watched his father walk out, grateful for the silence that followed. Constant company for the past two hours left him on edge, and the information that filled that time left him angry. He'd kill for a lot of things right now: a circle, some Zeppelin playing in the background, and his chick.

He wanted to _see_ her. To touch her. To look into her eyes and know that it was all true—that he'd fallen into this shithole without her by his side. He knew one look at her would tell him everything—if they were salvageable. And if they were, maybe seeing the hurt in her eyes would send him into overdrive and a plan would snap into place and he'd figure out how to fix all of it. That ability had never failed him before. Her pain just _did_ something to him.

Without her there to confirm it all though…man, it all just felt like one big joke that he wasn't in on.

As if on cue, the door opened again and Fez and Kelso walked in.

"Hey, buddy…" Kelso said in a falsely cheery voice, fear in his eyes.

Hyde stared at him hard, determined to not miss anything in his friend's behavior. If there was something Kelso would try to hide, he'd catch it. "I get now why you were so damn scared to tell me where you live."

"Look, Hyde…"

"Did you sleep with her?"

"No."

"Were you gonna?"

Kelso stared back at Hyde, his jaw clenched, and then looked down in shame. "Yeah. But you gotta understand. She was so upset, man. It took me an hour to get her to stop crying and another hour to convince her to go through with it…ow!"

Hyde made a move to grab the other pillow to throw at Kelso's head, but Kelso kept talking.

"No, hear me out, man! That's how we got into this mess in the first place. You wouldn't listen to us. You got pissed and took off and married a stripper. And then you flaunted her under Jackie's nose like Jackie was trash. And the rest of us," Kelso said as he gestured towards Fez, "have been cleaning up the mess since. Look, I'm sorry I tried to score with her, all right? Because it was me that wanted it. Not her. So don't go all Hyde on us and cut her out of your life again and make her more miserable than she already is."

Hyde shut his eyes and took four deep breaths to calm down, focusing on W.B.'s words_. If you don't like your reality, change it._

He knew his problems with Jackie weren't just her psycho need for commitment and marriage. It's why he was almost relieved when he thought she was his wife. It would have meant he'd been able to get through his own shit finally—and he didn't even have to work for it. Free pass. He just woke up one day and boom: everything was okay.

But it wasn't. Eight months of missing memories and he found himself in the same place as before: confused, scared, aloof, and hurtful. All the things he'd tried not to be when it came to Jackie.

"Fine. But once I get out of this bed, I get a free shot, man, for you trying to get with my girl."

"Well, that's not fair! You already did."

"Yeah, but I don't remember it so you could be lying."

"Fez! Tell him."

"How would I know? I wasn't even there."

Hyde turned towards Kelso with a smirk in place. "See? No proof."

"Fine!"

"Fine. Now, tell me about this Sam chick."

Kelso shrugged. "I don't know. She's tall and blonde and has big boobs."

Hyde cocked his head, unimpressed. "That's it?"

Again, Kelso shrugged. "Kinda, yeah."

Hyde grimaced. "Why the hell would I leave Jackie for that?"

Kelso and Fez glanced at each other before Fez spoke up. "Hyde, man…please don't let Jackie hear you say that. She's been beating herself up for months trying to figure that out."

"Shit." Hyde sighed, feeling another headache come on. "Okay, well, where the hell is she now?"

"Oh, she took off. She wanted pancakes."

"My wife left her recently comatose husband in the hospital because she was craving pancakes?"

Kelso nodded.

"Sounds like I picked a real winner."

"Yeah," Fez said as he walked towards Hyde's bed. "That's the thing. Did…uhh…did the Formans tell you where you were going when you got in your accident?"

Hyde shook his head once. "No, why? What's that got to do with the bimbo?"

Fez nodded, his hands braced on footboard of the bed. "That's what I thought. You didn't want me to tell Jackie 'cause you said it had nothin' to do with her, but now I'm not so sure."

"What is it, man?"

"You were on your way to the courthouse, Hyde. You were gonna file for a divorce."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: Thank you for reading! Please tell me what you thought. I've quickly remembered how addicted I am to reviews, so if you have time, please send one my way!

Also, as a side note, I couldn't really find any instance where W.B. goes into his background, but I imagine he worked from the ground up. If the show actually does say somewhere that that isn't the case, then let's just chalk this one up to creative license.


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note:** Enjoy!

* * *

><p>February 10, 1979<p>

11:15 p.m.

"Hello?"

"_Hey, Donna."_

"Fez. Good. Any news? And tell me quick, 'cause Jackie's in the bath."

"_Ooh, tell me more."_

"Fez!"

"_Oh, all right. You're no fun. Hyde talked to the Formans and they told him pretty much everything. It went okay, but he's not happy. Like, really not happy. He threw pillows at Kelso."_

Donna cracked a smile, not surprised.

"_Umm…W.B. stopped by for a bit. And Kelso's getting ready to head back to Chicago. Oh, and they're keeping him for another night. How is she?"_

"She's…well, she's okay, I guess. Can you do me a favor and stay at the basement tonight?"

"_Ooh, girls night. Got it."_

"I'm serious, Fez. I better not catch you here."

"_That's my apartment!"_

"Yeah, and I can still beat your ass."

"_Fine. Oh, did you tell Jackie about Hyde and the courthouse?"_

"…uhhh…well, I was going to. But I kind of chickened out at the last minute and offered to order a pizza instead." Donna grinned guiltily into the phone.

"_Good, 'cause Hyde doesn't want her to know."_

Donna sighed. "Damn it. We're back to that?"

"_No. He said he wants to be the one to tell her."_

"…oh. Well, that's good then. Okay, I won't tell—oh, shit. She's coming out. Gotta go."

Donna hung up phone and ran back into the kitchen. "Pizza's here!"

The bathroom door opened and Jackie walked out in a lavender robe, towel-drying her hair as she walked across the room. "Thanks. Have you heard anything yet?"

"Yeah. Fez called while you were in the bathroom. Hyde's being released tomorrow, probably. And I convinced Fez to stay at the basement tonight so we have the place to ourselves."

Jackie took a second look at Donna, confused by this level of consideration. "Okay…why?"

Donna shrugged. "I don't know. I figured we could talk or something. Hang out. Maybe have a facial without worrying about Fez trying to eat the face mask stuff."

"Look. That's sweet, but I don't need your pity, okay? I'm gonna be fine. Really."

Donna sighed and set down the parmesan cheese. "This isn't about pity, Jackie. I just…I haven't really been there for you, all right? With the whole Hyde thing. And…I don't know. Just let me do this for you, okay? Humor me tonight and I can leave you alone after." She turned back to the slices on the plates and continued sprinkling more cheese on.

Jackie smiled. Sometimes, she really felt like she forgot how great of a friend Donna was. "Facials sound nice. But watch the cheese, goon. I need to keep my figure."

Donna grinned and slid the slice with the most cheese over to Jackie, knowing that despite her protests, Jackie loved to pile on the stuff.

"And I have just the thing!" Jackie said enthusiastically around bites of her pizza as she walked back towards the bathroom. "Since all this stupid stress is making my delicate skin break out, we can try this soothing hot clay mask that Brooke sent me from Chicago. It should do wonders for your pores too, Donna!"

Donna huffed a small laugh as she shook her head in amusement. "Sounds great."

o-o-o

38 Minutes Later

A horrible, screeching sound came blasting out of the TV and both Donna and Jackie covered their ears around dual groans.

"God, I hate that part," Jackie said with a shudder.

"_Then, you've got your mace! Zap. Right in the face. And finally, for in-fighting, the punch of power."_

"I could use one of those," Jackie said, lost in thought as she eyed the brass knuckles being handed to Goldie Hawn.

"Why? You've said it yourself. Everyone loves you here. Nobody's gonna try and hurt you. And if they would, just use everything we learned at that self-defense class."

"Not for here, Donna. For when I finally get out of this town."

"Yeah? Where you thinkin'? Gonna give Chicago another shot?"

Jackie grimaced. "I'd rather die. And we weren't supposed to be talking about Steven, remember?"

"Sorry," Donna said, remembering Jackie's earlier plea to forget all things Hyde for the night. It's why they chose _Foul Play_ over _Grease_ for the movie, Jackie insisting Danny Zuko reminded her too much of Hyde. Incidentally, _Foul Play_ reminded Donna too much of Kelso and Brooke—hence bringing up Chicago. "How about Milwuakee?"

Jackie shrugged. "You think it's far enough?"

"Are you getting out of town or running away?"

"Maybe a little bit of both," Jackie said softly, staring thoughtfully at the TV. "San Francisco looks nice."

Donna cracked a smile. "You think your hair would survive the wet climate?"

"Don't be ridiculous, Donna. My hair bends to no land, wet or dry."

Donna grinned. "San Francisco would be nice."

"Then you should come. You've always wanted to see the world. You could start at one side of the country and just mosey your way over."

Donna smiled, liking the idea, but knew it to be as unlikely as Jackie's claim to her climate-controlled hair. "True, but I don't know if I could leave Eric behind." She shrugged. "He's coming back this year. Maybe we could all go together."

"What if I can't wait that long?" Jackie asked, her head resting on the back of the couch as she looked at her friend.

Donna smiled, wishing there was something she could say that wasn't: "I'm sorry your relationship failed, but I still have hope in mine." She settled with, "Let's just watch the movie."

Jackie turned back towards the TV, content for now.

o-o-o

February 11, 1979

1:13 a.m.

Donna jerked awake in the middle of the second ring and picked up on the third. "Hello?" she hissed into the receiver, taking a quick peek at the other end of the couch and relieved to find Jackie still asleep. They'd both knocked out half-way through the movie, which—if Donna's memory was correct—was about to end in just a couple of minutes and cut to black.

"_Donna."_

Donna froze, her eyes going wide as she looked at Jackie a second time.

"_Donna, is she there?"_

"Why are you calling here?!" Donna whispered furiously into the receiver, trying to keep her voice as low as possible.

"_Because, I just…shit. You're right. This was definitely a bad idea."_

"How do you even have this number?"

"_The Formans gave me everyone's numbers so I can reach people."_

"Damn it, those two. Do you know what would have happened if she'd answered? Chaos. That's what. And more crying."

"_Look, man. I'm sorry, all right? I just…I don't know. I wanted to talk to her."_

"No, I can't allow that." Donna grabbed the blanket she'd been using and pulled it up to cover her mouth and the receiver, hoping it would muffle her voice, thankful for the sounds of squealing tires that were coming from the TV.

"_What are you, her keeper?"_

"For tonight, yeah. I am."

"_Donna, come on."_

"Look, Hyde. I'm really glad you're okay and all, but let me give you the skinny on what's been going on. You both messed up with Chicago and Vegas. And instead of getting past your shit and working through it, you got drunk, married a stripper, and rubbed Jackie's broken heart in it. You don't get to just call in the middle of the night and pretend that all of that didn't happen, memory loss or not. If she wants to talk to you, she'll come to you."

Donna heard him curse but stood her ground. "I mean it."

"_It's not fair, man."_

Donna sighed. "No, it isn't. But if you want to work things out, then you have to understand where she is right now. You can't rush her into anything."

"_Fine."_ Donna heard him sigh. _"You're a good friend."_ _Click._

She slowly placed the receiver back, careful not to make a sound, and clicked the TV off, all noise and light cutting off with it. Just as she re-settled into the couch and got comfortable, she heard a quiet, soft voice.

"Thank you, Donna."

Donna reached over, found Jackie's hand in the dark, and gave it a tight squeeze before letting go and drifting off to sleep.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: The movie they're watching is _Foul Play_ with Goldie Hawn and Chevy Chase. I've seen it so many times growing up since it was one of my mom's favorites. If you like the mildly cheesy but mostly good-humored thriller-comedy type of flick, you'd like it.


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note: **Thanks, all, for staying with me thus far! This chapter's very Hyde-centric and gets into his head. Enjoy!

* * *

><p><em>Hyde walked purposefully towards the front of the room, noticing quickly that his destination kept moving further and further away. He picked up his speed to a jog, then began running, trying to reach the point he had his eye on.<em>

_Suddenly, he was there, and he jerked to a stop. He focused and slowly took in his surroundings, everything still a little hazy. His mouth opened in awe as he noticed the grandness of the room. It was very large with a high ceiling, and it was very intricately designed._

_Behind him, an organ began playing a familiar tune he couldn't quite place and the room suddenly filled with people. Some he knew, many he considered family, and others he couldn't recognize but somehow still knew who they were._

_The room filled with chatter, slowly getting louder and louder and louder until it drowned out the organ, becoming unbearable. Suddenly, it stopped._

_Quiet._

_He looked around again before something caught his eye. He focused and saw a figure in the distance moving towards him. Small. White. Glowing._

_The figure kept moving, gliding softly, and eventually she revealed herself: Jackie, in an opulent white dress, a smile adorning her face as she looked at him._

_Everything came together and he realized he wasn't just in a large room with a lot of people. He was in a church that had many well-dressed guests._

_He was getting married._

_He smiled at Jackie, reaching towards her and begging her to come to him quickly. She kept to her pace, almost gliding towards him. Her smile was radiant and a small giggle escaped her. And then he blinked and everything changed._

_The room was not as luxurious. The guests were not as merry. And the woman he was reaching towards was no longer Jackie._

_She was taller, blonde, and had on a simple expression, even though he couldn't really make out her face. She grabbed a hold of his hand and stood by him, whispering "I do" before everything floated away._

* * *

><p>February 11, 1979<p>

1:05 a.m.

Hyde startled awake and his hand smacked against the bed's railing in his sudden movement. "Shit," he whispered, out of breath, and he tried to focus on where he was.

As his eyes adjusted to the room's dim light, he began to recognize his surroundings and the past evening came to him in a flash. He groaned in annoyance, remembering his reality, before the haziness of his dream poked at him—Jackie in a white dress and him in a cathedral. He struggled to sit up, his head pounding, and scrubbed his face with his good hand.

Slowly, minuscule details dangled on the edge of his memory as he recalled the dream. A lot of people. Loud, ear splitting chatter. Bright, fuzzy surroundings. The only thing he really, truly remembered was the feeling of overwhelming numbness as he stood by that blonde chick—Sam, he supposed, was her name.

His wife.

An awful feeling began to pool in his gut, the result of too much bad news and a splitting headache.

Hyde groaned again. It just didn't make any fuckin' sense, man. It felt like just a couple of days ago he'd been really fuckin' happy. He had a nice job, a good family, and a really hot and amazing chick. He could still see so clearly her unbelievably happy expression when he gave her that graduation gift. He remembered how sweet her smile was, how she felt when she threw herself into his arms, the smell of her hair. He remembered how _he_ felt when he…

Shit. How was that not real anymore? How did it fall apart so fast? It just…fuck. It just didn't make any sense.

Hyde sighed and relaxed against the bed again. Nothing ever made any fuckin' sense without her. He needed to talk to her. He had to confirm that this hellhole he'd been handed was real. He just had to… He jumped up, alert, and looked for the phone they always provided patients. Locating it wedged deep between his four pillows, he pulled it out and turned it on.

He reached towards the table to the side of the bed and grabbed the piece of paper Mrs. Forman had left him, opening it and finding the right number.

_Riiiing. Riiiing. Riii—"Hello?" _hissed a female voice.

Damn. He hadn't considered Donna. He knew he'd have to work some serious magic to get through her, to even have a chance at talking to his girl.

"Donna."

Silence…already a bad sign. Hyde took a deep breath and plunged in.

"Donna, is she there?"

"_Why are you calling here?!"_

Hyde dropped his head. Yeah, definitely not gonna happen. "Because, I just…shit. You're right. This was definitely a bad idea."

"_How do you even have this number?"_

Hyde shrugged and looked at a list of names—most he recognized and a couple names he had to work to recall from his talk with the Formans—in Mrs. Forman's neat scrawl. "The Formans gave me everyone's numbers so I can reach people."

"_Damn it, those two. Do you know what would have happened if she'd answered?" _

Hyde recalled his most recent memory of Jackie—her smiling and throwing herself at him.

"_Chaos. That's what. And more crying."_

The image in his head quickly morphed into that day in his El Camino when he'd confessed about the nurse. He didn't think he could ever willingly forget—no matter how hard he tried—the look of realization that stole her features when he started talking. A look that had quickly turned in to resolve to leave him. He'd never felt the force of her strength until that moment. "Look, man. I'm sorry, all right? I just…I don't know. I wanted to talk to her."

"_No, I can't allow that."_

Hyde rolled his eyes. "What are you, her keeper?"

"_For tonight, yeah. I am."_

"Donna, come on.

"_Look, Hyde. I'm really glad you're okay and all, but let me give you the skinny on what's been going on."_

A strange and sticky sort of shame began to sweep over him, clinging to his skin like sap, even though he couldn't actually remember anything he'd done. He just knew it was bad.

"_You both messed up with Chicago and Vegas. And instead of getting past your shit and working through it, you got drunk, married a stripper, and rubbed Jackie's broken heart in it."_

Hyde sighed. That was the third time somebody had told him in the past few hours that he'd been a complete jerk to Jackie about some stripper. It was damning evidence, and it pointed directly at him.

"_You don't just get to call in the middle of the night and pretend that all of that didn't happen, memory loss or not. If she wants to talk to you, she'll come to you."_

"Fuck."

"_I mean it."_

He shook his head. "It's not fair, man."

"_No, it isn't. But if you want to work things out, then you have to understand where she is right now. You can't rush her into anything."_

"Fine." He sighed heavily, resolved to his fate for now. "You're a good friend, Donna." He shut off the phone and tossed it back within the pillows. If the past four hours were any indication, Jackie had a hell of a team guarding her. He just never thought it would be from him. And it made him realize he'd have to work pretty damn hard to weasel his way around them to get to her.

A thought suddenly occurred to him that left him more afraid than he'd like to admit: what if she didn't want him when he finally got through her troop of bodyguards? What if those bodyguards weren't there for her, but because of her?

Since the day they got together on that hot day in the basement—and maybe even before, despite her protests—he'd never really doubted her affection for him. At first, she was always just _there_. And then, soon, she was there for him, and he liked it.

Getting through to her while she was angry at him was one thing… getting through to her when she didn't even want him was something entirely different, and he wasn't sure he was up to the task.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: The next update will come quicker. I'm just fine-tuning it right now. Until then, please tell me what you thought!


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note:** Like I said, the next chapter would be coming along soon :) It's mainly a transitioning chapter, but it's here! Enjoy!

* * *

><p>February 11, 1979<p>

12:48 p.m.

"So, he'll be okay?"

"He'll need to come back in a few weeks so we can remove the cast, but yes. He seems to be functioning normally, so there's really no reason he can't recover at home."

Donna nodded, relieved. She knew how much Hyde hated hospitals.

"We just have a few things to finish up with here and then you three will be on your way!" the nurse said brightly. "Just remember to stop by the pharmacy on your way out. He'll need something for those headaches and the pain."

"Thanks," Donna said before turning and making her way to Hyde's room. She had expected him to still be in bed, but when she entered, he was already up, dressed, and trying to stuff a box of chocolates in an already stuffed grocery bag. "Hey."

Hyde turned quickly at her voice and Donna saw his eyes flick to either side of her before answering. "Hey."

"You're ready."

"Almost."

"Here. I can carry that." She grabbed the box from him and shook it—still full. He must have gotten it after Fez left last night. "Who gave you these?"

"One of the nurses. She thinks I'm cute," Hyde said dismissively, used to the attention he got from chicks. But even if he never got Jackie back, he didn't think he'd ever be able to stomach another nurse.

Donna shook her head and smiled. "They said there was some more paperwork so it'll be a minute."

Hyde nodded.

"And…uhh…there's someone here to see you."

He turned to her, his eyes searching her face, and immediately realized who she meant. He took a deep breath and nodded. "Okay."

Donna nodded once and backed up towards the door.

"Wait."

She paused.

"Was she okay with it? The divorce."

Donna smiled softly, recognizing his concern. "Yeah. She suggested it."

Hyde took a second, letting that sink in, before nodding again. "Okay. Go ahead."

Donna went to the door and opened it slightly, whispering to someone just outside before coming back. The woman who walked through the door matched Kelso's previous description to a tee: tall, blonde, big boobs. This was the woman he'd married.

"Hey, Hyde."

And she called him Hyde. A strange experience for him since Jackie had become his chick. Jackie had also made a habit of tagging on a "My" before his given name, and he never really thought about how much he liked that until this very moment. "Hi."

Donna stood to the side, rocking her heels back in forth as if she were wading through the tension in the room until she realized she didn't have to be there. "Okay! Well, I'm just gonna go grab the car. I'll meet you guys out there in a sec." She grabbed Hyde's bag from his hand and walked out quickly, the door shutting loudly behind her.

"So, you're Sam. My…wife." Hyde cringed slightly at the word escaping his mouth, not liking how it sounded as he directed it towards a woman he'd never met.

She nodded once, a smile on her face. Then she sighed. "Look, Hyde. Everyone filled me in on what's going on and I don't really wanna cause you any trouble. Let's just go to the courthouse like we agreed and get this divorce over and done with, okay?"

Hyde, a little stunned, nodded slowly. "Okay. That was easier than I thought it would be."

Samantha shrugged. "I wasn't here to make your life harder. I was here to make it easier."

Something about that word stuck with him…_easier_. He thought he almost remembered something before it flew away in a flash.

"We had a deal though that I could stay for a couple of days, so will that be cool? I don't have anywhere to go yet."

Judging from what everyone had been telling him, it was gonna take a while to get Jackie back. He didn't see how a few days could hurt.

o-o-o

February 11, 1979

3:12 p.m.

"She's _staying_ with him?!"

Fez nodded solemnly. "It seems that way, yes."

"Unbelievable." Jackie shook her head as she paced back and forth across the living room. "He's always gonna choose that whore over me, isn't he?"

"Jackie…you're…you know. Not together."

Deflated, Jackie collapsed on to the couch. "No. But yesterday, according to him, we were. But all she has to do is walk in and he's all over her again."

"He really wasn't all over her."

"No, but he will be. And nothing will have changed."

"Jackie…"

"You ever wonder what you're doing, Fez?"

"What do you mean?" he asked as he pulled a tootsie roll out of his shirt pocket and popped it in his mouth.

"I mean in life. Are you where you wanna be?"

"Of course. I'm in America and always within a mile radius of candy. I have a great job that allows me to touch all the women I want. And I have my friends around all the time. What else is there?"

Jackie shrugged, recognizing all too well the feeling that began to resettle in her gut when she heard Steven was staying with the whore, even after his accident-causing amnesia. "Just more, I guess. Not this." A tiny, small flare of hope had taken ahold of her throughout the night, and it had just been extinguished. Again. Maybe this is what she needed to just…go.

o-o-o

February 11, 1979

6:34 p.m.

"You _told_ her?!"

Fez shrugged. "Yeah. She deserves to know the truth, Hyde."

"The right truth, you idiot. As in what's actually going on. Not whatever crap you came up with."

"It's not crap! The whore is staying here with you even though you don't remember who she is. What else is there?"

Hyde wanted to strangle him. "The divorce, you moron. You knew we were gonna do that."

"Well, how was I supposed to know you still planned on divorcing your wife when earlier you were sitting all cozy together on the couch? And her stuff is still all over your room, as in it's not getting packed."

"We weren't cozy. We were talking. She was filling me in on what happened in Vegas and since then. And her stuff isn't packed yet because she needs to stay here for a couple of days. _None_ of which needed to be told to Jackie, by you. Who knows what she thinks now."

Fez grinned guiltily. "Well, she thinks you chose the whore over her again. But this time she said she didn't want to stick around to see it anymore."

Hyde suddenly became very still and he lifted his head slowly. "What?" he asked, his voice low.

"Do you blame her?"

He laid his deadliest glare on Fez. "I wouldn't if it were true. But it's not. Now tell me exactly what she said."

Fez whimpered.

"I mean it, man. Every damn word. I need to know what I'm dealing with here."

Fez sighed. "Okay, honestly? I don't really know why she stayed before. I mean, we weren't kidding. She has been miserable. But she had already decided to stay, so she did, and she's been working through it. You know, try and focus on her career and stuff. But staying here…" Fez shrugged. "I always thought that maybe a part of her thought you'd come to your senses or something and want her back. She didn't want to make it hard for you to choose her again, like last time. But then you didn't. So, I figured after a while, she'd leave."

"She never left?"

"No."

"But she's thinking about doing it now."

Fez nodded once.

"Without even talking to me first?"

Fez sighed. "We've been trying to tell you, Hyde. You _both _screwed up with Chicago and Vegas. And you never worked through your stuff after. Is it such a surprise that everything would repeat itself again?"

Hyde held his head in his hand, truly disgusted with himself. He _had _to fix this, he just didn't know how. And with the threat of Jackie leaving, he knew he had to do it fast. He had to get the blonde one out of here. He had to prove to Jackie that he wouldn't repeat her history. He'd woken up to hell, but it wasn't gonna stay that way.

He'd fix it for her.

He stood quickly and headed towards the stairs, tossing a "Thanks, Fez!" behind him on his way up.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Many of you have expressed anticipation of the first meeting between our distressed couple. Rest assured, it's up next and I'm working on it :) Please review!


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's Note: **As promised :) Enjoy!

* * *

><p>February 13, 1979<p>

12:52 p.m.

"Oh, Steven…"

Hyde and Red sighed at the same time.

"Mrs. Forman, please. You can't keep cryin' whenever you see me, man." He walked over and hugged her to his chest, causing her to cry harder.

"Kitty, please. The boy is fine."

"I know," Kitty said around a sniffle. "It's just…for a while there, Steven, you weren't."

"But I'm okay now. See? I'm up and walking and everything. Just a couple of minor headaches. And this damn thing." He held up his wrist, encased in a cast.

Kitty shook her head. "I don't mean the accident. Though of course we were so worried then too. I mean before the accident when you were so angry and unhappy." She reached up and cupped his cheek in her hand. "You tried to cover it up, of course. But a mother knows."

Hyde smiled and looked to Red, expecting to see the other man roll his eyes. Instead, Red was staring back at him in the way that always made him nervous—like the man could see through him or something. He probably could.

"Since you woke up and we've told you everything, you've been different. Determined, I guess. Like you're on a mission." She giggled and wiped her tears away, turning back to the stove. "Anyway, it's just nice to see."

Hyde watched Red and Kitty return to their morning routine. He wasn't entirely sure how to react to all of that. To say he didn't know what he would do without these two was an understatement. "Thanks, Mrs. Forman," he said quickly.

"You're welcome, sweetie. Now sit down and have a sandwich."

"You have a plan yet?" Red asked when Hyde sat down.

"Sort of," Hyde said around a mouthful of bread and lunch meat.

The newspaper lowered. "Sort of? You think we would have won in the war if we 'sort of' went in for an attack? No, dumbass. We 'sort of' would have died."

"Look, calm down, all right? I've got it handled." Hyde glanced at Red and sighed at the older man's disbelieving look. "I do."

"All right. Walk me through it."

"What? No, I'm not gonna walk you—"

"Bullet point version then?"

"I said I've got—"

"Then why is she still here?"

Hyde took a deep breath, trying to focus on his chewing instead of his own aggravation. "Why is who still here?"

Red didn't answer, choosing instead to stare at Hyde with a blank, almost condescending expression.

"She needed to stay here for a couple of days. I told you that."

Red nodded. "And it's been a couple of days. I don't see a suitcase by the door yet."

"Look, we got the divorce papers and already signed them, all right? What more do you want?"

Red chuckled. "This isn't about what _I _want, Steven. You know that."

Hyde sighed. "The papers are signed, dated, and I dropped them off at the courthouse this morning. Sam is leaving on the bus out of town tonight; she has her ticket. Donna and Fez are gonna arrange it so Jackie's alone in the apartment tomorrow at noon. We'll hash it out then."

Red smiled. "Good job."

"Like I said. I've got it handled."

o-o-o

February 13, 1979

3:42 p.m.

"You're gonna screw it up."

"Will you shut up? I'm not gonna screw it up."

Fez and Donna looked at each other doubtfully.

Hyde groaned. "Your vote of confidence in my abilities is heartwarming, really."

Donna grinned. "Sorry, Hyde. It's just…uhhh…well, you kind of haven't been around the past five months."

Hyde glared at her. "I have too. I just…can't remember it."

"Yeah," Fez said, his voice a little muddled with a lollipop in his mouth. "That's kind of the problem." He shrugged a shoulder. "And maybe the solution."

Donna laughed. "Yeah, Hyde. All you needed to finally get your head out of your ass was crash into a brick wall."

"Shut it, or I'm gonna think you guys staged the whole thing."

"We're good," Fez said, his head dipping in acknowledgement, "but even we can't plan amnesia. Or else I would have gotten rid of all those years of horny virgindom a long time ago."

Donna grinned widely. "And maybe the years following when you still couldn't—"

"Shut it, blondie!"

Donna laughed as she high-fived Hyde. "Speaking of blondes. Where's your wife?"

"Will you stop calling her that?"

She chuckled. "You can't go into this being afraid of the truth. You won't survive two minutes with Jackie."

"No, I'm serious. The papers are signed and being processed now. She's really not my wife anymore."

"Oh. Good. And sorry."

"And she's leaving in a couple of hours anyway, so it doesn't matter where she is."

Donna shrugged. "You're still gonna screw it up."

"I'm not gonna—shut up!"

"Okay, seriously, Hyde." Donna waited until Hyde turned towards her. The count in her head got up to ten by the time he did. His eyebrow was raised in expectation, as if telling her, _this better be good_. "If you do screw it—no, listen! If you do screw it up, you'll probably still have a chance to make it right as long as you don't react so…well…like you usually would."

"Zen?"

Donna glared at him. "Angry and indifferent is more like it. For five months, you made it pretty damn convincing that you didn't care about her."

"Yeah," Fez said as he got comfortable in the lawn chair. "You might not remember it, but Jackie definitely will. You were pretty consistent. So, be consistent about this too."

o-o-o

February 13, 1979

6:25 p.m.

"I'm not so sure about this, Donna."

"Relax. He's not going to just come barging in here."

"How do you know?"

Donna rolled her eyes. "He was really only ever here when you stayed here, Jackie. So, calm down."

It had been three days since Hyde woke up, remembering nothing of his behavior the past few months or of her horrible mistake in Chicago, and Jackie had been on a constant state of edginess the whole time. She kept her eyes peeled for him at every turn, dreading the moment when they'd eventually have to meet.

"Besides, it's not like you can keep hiding forever, you know. You have to see him at some point."

"I know," Jackie said, fingering a loose thread of the blanket on Donna's bed. "It's just…what the hell am I gonna say? What's he gonna do? I don't know what to think 'cause I don't know what the hell is going on."

Donna swiveled around and faced her. "That could easily be solved by actually talking to him, you know."

Jackie groaned. "I know that, okay? Just let me be scared."

Donna lifted her hands in surrender. "All right. I won't say anything else."

"Thanks."

"No problem. Now, help me! Or else there was no reason to bring you here in the first place."

"Okay, okay. Jeez. You're so dramatic."

Donna's eyes popped wide open. "Me! What about you with yo—"

"Just kidding! Dang. And I thought I was on edge!"

Donna huffed a laugh. "You are."

o-o-o

41 Minutes Later

"See? Perfect." Jackie's grin quickly turned into a frown as she eyed Donna's wide, fearful eyes. "What's wrong? You look fantastic!"

"Remind me again why I'm doing this?"

"To save your relationship, dink."

"And why am I doing that? He broke up with me."

Jackie rolled her eyes and set down the curling iron. "As gross as I find it, you know you and Eric are meant to be together. This," she waggled her eyebrows and she gestured towards Donna, "is just going to remind him of that."

"What about Randy?"

"What about Randy? He's nothing. Just a blip. Like Casey Kelso and those weird girls Eric dated when you split up."

"Yeah, but won't this be like…cheating or something?"

"Cheating?" Jackie asked, her eyebrow hitched and her face blank. "On a guy you've talked to and hung out with a few times? I think he'll be okay."

"I just don't want him to think I've been leading him on or anything."

"Have you?"

"No. Well, not intentionally."

Jackie sighed. "Look, if it makes you feel that bad, just talk to him. He'll understand, I swear. Stop beating yourself up over it. You were sad and taking comfort in what was available."

"Like you did with Kelso?"

Jackie glared at Donna in the mirror. "Like what I was _gonna _ do with Michael, yes. We didn't actually do anything though. Thank, God."

Donna nodded. "And maybe what Hyde did with Sam?"

Jackie sighed softly as she turned around and collapsed on the bed. "He _stayed _with her Donna. There's a big difference. And even if he hadn't, everything else he did after...the insults and the looks and the way he'd mock me…"

"I know." Donna smiled in the mirror at Jackie. "But maybe…at first…what he did was similar to what you were gonna do."

Jackie sighed. "Maybe."

Donna grinned, almost ready to consider this a small victory, when the door opened. "Donna, I need to ask—whoa."

Donna whipped around, her eyes wide. Jackie was gonna kill her. Then she noticed what Hyde was looking at and she suddenly felt very exposed. "Shit. Hyde! Look away!" she exclaimed as she ran for cover.

"It's not my fault, man! You just gonna leave your door unlocked when you're dressed like—"

"Steven," Jackie said softly from her place on the bed, her form rigid and her eyes wide in fear.

Hyde's gaze whipped over to her, his heart suddenly pounding very hard. "Jackie."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note:<strong> :) Soon! Please review!


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Note**: And here we are! I debated splitting this chapter into two parts since it's so long but ultimately decided against it. Consider it a little gift for the holidays—my thanks to you for keeping with me thus far! Do enjoy

* * *

><p><em>Donna grinned, almost ready to consider this a small victory, when the door opened. "Donna, I need to ask—whoa."<em>

_Donna whipped around, her eyes wide. Jackie was gonna kill her. Then she noticed what Hyde was looking at and she suddenly felt very exposed. "Shit. Hyde! Look away!" she exclaimed as she ran for cover._

"_It's not my fault, man! You just gonna leave your door unlocked when you're dressed like—"_

"_Steven," Jackie said softly from her place on the bed, her form rigid and her eyes wide in fear._

_Hyde's gaze whipped over to her, his heart suddenly pounding very hard. "Jackie."_

* * *

><p>February 13, 1979<p>

7:10 p.m.

Jackie's chest rose and fell rapidly in quick, terrified breaths as she fought to control her racing heartbeat. Distantly she was aware of Donna scrambling to find clothes to cover her nearly-nude body, but all she could focus on was the man in front her who still held her heart within his clutches. She half-expected him to finally look away with a sneer but he kept staring, and a multitude of emotions crossed his face—each one more fascinating and terrifying than the last.

There was no contempt, no anger, no passivity. Nothing in his gaze mirrored the past five months of hell she'd been living through. Instead, she saw shock, fear, and a hint of a smile in those clear blue eyes of his. For the first time in too long, he was smiling. _At her_.

And it scared the shit out of her. Jackie almost hated being right: he wanted her back. The image that had been swimming in her head for the past few days of having to turn him down suddenly became too painful to bear. Her eyes filled with tears and she got up.

"I can't do this," she said hurriedly as she ran from the room, a sob escaping her when she was finally down the hall and out of earshot. She was both relieved and heartbroken that he made no move to come after her.

o-o-o

Hyde remembered reading somewhere that a spike in adrenaline, like the one he was experiencing right now, was why people _could_ see moments of their lives flashing before their eyes before they thought they were gonna die. Because it made the person speed up and everything else just slowed down in comparison.

He did not feel that way now. His reaction time rivaled that of a sloth. By the time he thought to shout at Jackie to wait or to try and stop her, she was already out the door and down the hallway. He thought about going after her but Donna's voice popped in his head: _"If she wants to talk to you, she'll come to you."_

"Damn it," he said, low and under his breath.

"Well," Donna said, tying her robe around her nice and snug. "At least you didn't get to screw it up."

"I never even got to say anything."

"Yeah." She nodded. "And maybe that was for the best." She walked towards the phone at the side of her bed.

"Aren't you going to go after her?"

"No." Donna picked up the phone and dialed, speaking a moment later. "Fez. Good. You're home. It happened … Yeah … No … Yeah, she did." She sighed. "Probably … I know … Yeah, I will … Okay. Bye."

When she hung up and turned back around, she found Hyde sitting at her desk with his head in his hand. "Hyde, it's not that bad."

He looked up, incredulous. "Not that bad? She just ran away from me," he said, his voice clear as he explained it to her. "She's only ever done that when I've hurt her. I didn't even get to fucking say anything and she ran. Do you know what that means?"

Donna turned her body towards him, giving him her full attention.

"It means she's in a lot of fucking pain and I have no idea—no memory—of how she got there. What the hell did I do to her that I don't even have to fucking say anything and she runs away from me?"

"I…" Donna sighed and scrubbed her face with her hands. "You need to talk about that with Jackie. Even though I know it's gonna tear her apart, she needs to be the one to tell you everything. You'll only get bits and pieces from us."

Donna left Hyde to his thoughts and went to her case of vinyls, flipping through them idly. They never told the rest of the group but she and Eric used to hang out a lot in her room, smoking and listening to records. Some of her favorite memories of him happened during those lazy, giggly hours, set to the sounds of Zeppelin or the Stones or Jethro Tull.

Donna smiled as she selected one, setting the needle gently on track 10 of _Surrealistic Pillow_. The soulful, crooning voice of Grace Slick filled the air and just as Donna sat back down on the bed, Hyde finally spoke up.

"Should I even be doing this?"

Donna shut her eyes, suppressing a groan. "You can't be serious."

He lifted his head and looked at her in confusion.

"Giving up? Really?"

Hyde didn't suppress his groan.

"It's been three fucking days, Hyde."

"I know that, all right?" he snapped. "I know how long it's fucking been since I woke up to this shithole. And for three days I've been thinking that whatever mess Jackie and I got into, we could work through it. Like we always do."

"And what? You see her once and get scared?"

"No," he said slowly, his voice deep and gravelly in frustration. "I see Jackie…" He shut his eyes, remembering the pain that radiated from hers. "…and finally get that maybe we won't be able to work through it. That maybe I fucked up so damn badly that there's nothing left to repair. Why torture her further?"

Donna sat there and almost began to feel bad for Hyde until she remembered he didn't need a soft hand or sympathy. He needed to be kicked in the right direction, and kicked hard. Or else he'd never get it through his thick skull.

"Okay, first of all, you're a moron," she said, accepting his glare. "Secondly, you don't get to decide, single-handedly, whether or not you have a future with her. That is a joint decision and you need to let her have her say."

"And if she doesn't want me?"

Donna sighed. "_If_ after you've actually given it all you've got and then some, and she still doesn't want anything to do with you, then you move on. But don't you dare cast her aside again _before_ you actually reach that point. Which brings me to number three."

Hyde's eyebrow hiked up. "And that is?"

"I was with her when we got news of your accident," she said, her voice and demeanor softening. "We were at her apartment and in the middle of an argument about which ABBA song is better—I'll never understand how she roped me into that, by the way—when Fez called. The look of fear in her eyes, Hyde…it's not something I ever want to see again." She took a deep breath, forcing the memory away of Jackie huddled on the couch, crying hysterically. "She knew you wouldn't want her at the hospital when you woke up, so she stayed by that phone the whole time. When someone reacts like that to you being hurt, you don't just give up on them."

Hyde looked away, nodding.

"Just give her a little space. You both need to cool off."

"You gonna go over there?"

Donna nodded. "Yeah. I just have something to do first."

Hyde smirked. "And does this have something to do with the scrawny neighbor boy?"

Donna glared. "Don't you have to go drop off your wife at the train station?"

Hyde rolled his eyes as he stood. "Get bent, Pinciotti. And tell Forman I said hi."

o-o-o

35 Minutes Later

_Dear Eric,_

_I'll admit that when I read your letter, I was angry. Furious. I wanted to hop on the plane to Africa just to kick your ass and make you feel as bad as I did. And then I read it ten more times and talked it over with a friend and realized something—that letter was you showing me how you love me. It's like when you took off before our wedding._

_You should see Hyde. He's so angry about what he's woken up to. And I can't blame him. I only wish I knew sooner how unhappy he really was. He can be pretty convincing, you know? But he's determined to do the right thing now. He's set on getting Jackie back and fixing everything. But here's the thing: he's still Hyde. He still jumps to conclusions and makes decisions without talking it over with the one person he needs to talk it over with: Jackie._

_Sound familiar? I'm gonna say the same thing to you that I just told him. You don't get to just decide that we're done, Eric. Even if it's temporary while you're in Africa or whatever. We are not done. I still have a say in this relationship and I'm not ready for it to be finished._

_So, I took these for you. I actually tried to do something similar for you a few weeks ago but that ended up a disaster…and in Fez's hands. I know. These are different from the others—I burned those. Hopefully they'll remind you what you're missing and what you have to come back to. Because you will come back, Eric. And I'll be here._

_I love you._

_Donna_

_P.S. You let anybody see these, and I will actually hop on that plane to kick your ass._

o-o-o

February 13, 1979

8:22 p.m.

"Jackie, please don't cry," Fez said softly as he held Jackie tightly. Her distraught sobs tore him to pieces. He knew from Donna's phone call that Jackie would be sad from her first run-in with Hyde, but this was more than he'd bargained for.

"I can't do this, Fez," Jackie said, her voice shaking. "I thought I could. I know I said I wanted to leave, but I thought…maybe…I could stay and be civil and it won't hurt so much."

"Then why can't you? He's not gonna do the same thing as before. He's not gonna be mean anymore."

"No," she said, more tears streaming down her face. "Not while he's like this. Not while he doesn't remember anything."

"Jackie…"

"I know him, Fez. I know him better than anyone. I know he's angry about everything and he doesn't understand what's going on. I know he wants to fix it. I could see the hope in his eyes when he looked at me."

"Then what's the problem?" Fez asked, stroking Jackie's hair as she clung to him.

"Eventually…soon…he's gonna turn that anger towards me. Like he did before. I know he will. He'll try and fix it now but then he'll realize I'm not worth it and give up because I won't fall into his arms like I would have last year."

"No, I really think he…"

"And then he'll remember everything. He'll remember Chicago and how I forced that ultimatum on him. He'll remember seeing me with Michael. He'll remember how fun the gross slut was. He'll remember how good it felt to put me down. He'll realize he was right in giving up on me and it'll start all over again. I can't be here for that."

Jackie and Fez looked up when Donna walked in. The blonde smiled softly at the both of them, set her bag on the table, and sat down on the other side of Jackie.

"Jackie, look," Fez said, thankful for the interruption. "Donna and I have been talking to him and I really don't think he'll do that again."

Jackie shook her head as she stood and walked towards the kitchen. "He will. But you guys are right though. I need to talk to him. I need to see him and say goodbye."

o-o-o

February 13, 1979

9:38 p.m.

Hyde paced the length of his room in the basement, trying to formulate a new plan that didn't end in Jackie fleeing the room in tears, but nothing came to mind. Everything he thought up left her angry and him miserable.

He could write her a letter and have Donna make sure she read it, but he was never that good with words. He could buy her flowers and candy and crap, but for some reason he didn't think that would work. An image popped up in his head of her throwing all that stuff back at him, and he figured reality wouldn't be far off.

He could follow her everywhere and make sure she listened to what he had to say, but he didn't think that would work either. Besides, how much rejection was he supposed to take? Another idea floated to the forefront of his mind, but he questioned how wise that approach would be…

He paused, hearing the door to the basement open and close and then heels on the cement floor.

She was here.

Hyde decided to throw caution to the wind and give it his best shot, no matter how stupid the idea seemed.

o-o-o

Jackie walked into the basement, fully intent on saying her piece and then leaving—hopefully without crying off all her mascara again—but stopped when she realized it was empty. She looked towards Hyde's bedroom and sighed in frustration.

His light was off. There was nobody here. And she was rapidly losing her resolve as exhaustion caught up with her. It was just like him to not be here when she finally—

Suddenly, two strong arms folded around her and Jackie knew her worst fears were realized. His effect on her hadn't lessened since last September. She might not be strong enough to fight him.

"Jackie," he said quietly, his voice low. "I don't know what hell this is that I've woken up to, but even my messed up brain knows it isn't right." His arms slowly curled around her, holding her snug against his body, and she had to bite her lip to keep from moaning at the sensation.

He nudged his nose into her hairline, brushing the whorl of her ear. "You belong with me, doll. You can't deny this. Us. She isn't real, but you are."

This was the Steven she'd always known was lurking beneath the calm, cool, hurtful exterior she'd encountered recently. He was still there.

But she knew now what he was capable of…the level of hurt he could inflict if he wanted to—if he was in the right state of mind. And that knowledge tore her to pieces as she carefully unfolded his arms from around her.

"No, Steven, I can't deny it," she said quietly as she turned and looked him in the eye. "I can't deny that you belong with me." She paused. "But you did. You did many, many times. So, maybe I can learn how to too." She reached up and held his cheek softly in her hand. "Maybe one day I can look at you with the indifference you looked at me with just last week. And it won't hurt anymore."

Jackie walked away slowly, tears streaming down her face.

"You know how I feel."

She paused at his words, her hand on the doorknob. "I know. But you also knew how I felt and still did such hateful, cruel things. How can I trust you now, knowing you can do that to me at a drop of a hat?" She twisted the doorknob and walked out, leaving behind a defeated man in her wake.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: I really, really, really hope you liked this chapter. That last scene is actually what inspired me to write this story. The first chapter's been sitting on my hard drive for a few years, but one day, recently, this last scene popped up in my head and I knew I had to write the story for it.

Please let me know what you thought—I appreciate all comments. Thank you, and happy holidays!


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's Note:** Happy New Year, y'all! I'm celebrating with chardonnay & Jane Austen, so I'm all set :) Hope you're all having an equally fabulous time!

* * *

><p>"<em>You know how I feel."<em>

_She paused at his words, her hand on the doorknob. "I know. But you also knew how I felt and still did such hateful, cruel things. How can I trust you now, knowing you can do that to me at a drop of a hat?" She twisted the doorknob and walked out, leaving behind a defeated man in her wake._

* * *

><p>11 Days Later<p>

February 24, 1979

1:23 p.m.

"You know what I can't understand?"

"What?" Fez asked, kicking his feet up and relaxing into the couch in the basement, a grape-flavored jolly rancher swirling in his mouth and clicking against his teeth.

"Why nine months ago? I mean why that day? What really was so special about getting chosen as Betsy's godparents?"

"Oh, it was not about beating you and Eric as Betsy's godmother and godfather."

"It wasn't?" Donna asked, turning towards him.

"No."

Donna waited for an explanation and sighed when none came. "Well, then, what was it?"

Fez shrugged. "I don't know. I mean, I was curious too, but when I asked Jackie why she thought Hyde's mind chose _that _to stick to and forget everything else, she just said other stuff happened but she wouldn't tell me."

"Other stuff?"

He nodded.

"Like good stuff or bad stuff?"

"I don't know, but I think it was good stuff. She looked sad when she remembered it. And not sad like she wished it didn't happen, but sad like it did and could never happen again."

Donna sighed. "Well, it _could_ happen again, whatever it is, if she would just…"

"Yeah, I tried that. It didn't work."

"Nothing has. I mean, she leaves tomorrow for Milwaukee and I can't get her to change her mind. Hyde's really freaking out over it."

"Well he should. His woman is leaving and he's got no whore for backup."

"Fez!"

Fez shrugged. "It's true. I bet he's really missing hi—"

"Shut it, Fez," Hyde said, coming out of his room. He looked over at Donna. "Did you talk to her?"

Donna nodded. "Yeah, but it didn't do anything. She would barely even listen to me. Sorry, Hyde."

"Yeah. I figured. Fez and Mrs. Forman didn't have much luck either. I don't know what the hell to do anymore."

"Well, Jackie did say Milwaukee was just temporary," Fez said, consolingly.

Hyde snorted. "Yeah, until she makes enough to move even further away. Great."

"Look, Hyde…maybe this is it."

Hyde looked up at Donna, confusion marring his features.

"What we talked about in my room after your first run-in with her. Maybe this is when you should…I don't know. Let her go. I mean… nothing's working."

Hyde, hunched over, stared hard at the floor in contemplation, his expression set into a frown. "You said I should give it all I've got, and then some."

Donna nodded.

"Do you think we've reached that point?"

"Well, I don't want it to be…"

Hyde nodded. "Good. Because there has to be something. I just…haven't thought of it yet." With that, he got up and left the basement, leaving the two on the couch in combined surprise and relief.

Since his initial resolve to get Jackie back after Hyde had woken up, Donna knew he'd been different from the man she knew just three days prior. But this…this was much more than she'd imagined. Mr. Forman said it was just the kick in the head Hyde had needed to realize all that he'd lost. Donna had a hard time arguing with that—Hyde was dead set on happiness this go around, and he wasn't taking anything less.

And he needed all the help he could get. "You know what, Fez? He's right. This isn't over yet."

"What are you gonna do?"

Donna chewed on her lip in contemplation. "Not too sure, but there might be something we haven't tried yet."

o-o-o

February 24, 1979

5:26 p.m.

"Hello?"

"_Hey."_

Jackie sighed. "Oh, no. You too?"

"_Don't hang up."_

Jackie rolled her eyes. "I'm not gonna hang up on you, Michael. I just can't believe they got you too."

"_Nobody got me. I'm just calling to see how you're doing."_

"You know, Michael, when I was young and naïve, I might have believed that. But I'm not that same person anymore."

"_All right. Donna called. Is that so bad?"_

"No. It's not. I know she's just trying to watch out for me. But I made my decision and it would be nice if somebody could support me instead of hurtling arguments at me every five minutes."

"_I'm not gonna argue with you. You know that."_

Jackie collapsed onto the sofa. "I know."

"_I mean, I did it. I got outta town. I know how you feel."_

Jackie shrugged. "Sorta, yeah. I guess."

"_But I didn't do it for the same reasons."_

"Michael! I thought you said you weren't gonna argue with me on this."

"_I'm not! I'm not. I'm just thinking maybe you don't have all the information. And that…maybe…you're not doing it for the right reasons."_

"All right, Michael. What am I missing that's so important? And what do you mean not for the right reasons? Not wanting to get hurt again is a plenty good reason."

"_Okay, remember when I first heard that Brooke was pregnant? All you guys got really mad at me for letting it go when she said I was off the hook, right?"_

"Yeah. So?"

"_You guys got mad at me because I was taking the easy way out. I was scared and in over my head and willing to turn away from what I thought was a problem. Instead of trying to fix it, I ran."_

"Michael, this isn't the same thing. Brooke didn't hurt you like Steven hurt me."

"_But I was scared. Are you scared?"_

"Yes," Jackie admitted, reluctantly.

"_Then there you go."_

"He's gonna hurt me again, Michael. How much of that am I supposed to just take?"

"_You don't know that he's gonna hurt you again. You only think he will. Just like I didn't know if having a baby was gonna ruin my life. I just thought it would. Turns out, I wouldn't give Betsy or Brooke up for the world." _

Jackie heard him sigh and hung her head in frustration. Already, she was beginning to doubt her earlier resolve.

"_Look, Jackie. Yeah, Hyde has a pretty bad track record for messing everything up and not committing and being a jerk. But it seems like he's really trying to do the right thing here."_

"Trying to do the right thing would be to accept his mistakes, apologize, and let me go. Not keep me here or try and get me back because that's what _he _wants. "

"_He wants to make it up to you. He wants to right everything he did wrong. He coulda taken the easy way out and stayed with Sam—"_

"Michael…"

"_Sorry. He coulda stayed with the gross stripper, but he didn't. He's doing all of this because he wants __**you**__. I mean, he divorced her, didn't he? Doesn't that count for anything?"_

"A little. I guess. But I can't just take him back. I don't know if I ever can."

"_Aren't you willing to give it a shot though?"_

"Say I give him another chance," Jackie said as she got comfortable on the couch, kicking her feet up onto the armrests and stretching her arm above her. "I go over there and we start over and everything's great for a while."

"_Well…"_

"No, it would be. I _know_ it would be. But then something comes up like I get another job offer and need to move or he gets scared and refuses to commit to me. Then we're back to where we started."

"_Jackie, that—_

"Or say we're doing great and he gets his memory back. How am I gonna know whether or not he'll want to leave me again? I can't. And because of that, I can't just give my heart up to him again just to get it squashed. He'll go and find another stripper to replace me."

"_Jackie, that's not wh—"_

"He will, Michael! I know—"

"_Jackie!"_

"What?"

"_The stripper was a mistake."_

"Well, duh. Everyone knows that except Stev—"

"_No, HYDE knew it was a mistake."_

Jackie sat up. "What?"

She heard Kelso sigh again. _"He made everyone promise not to say anything to you. He kept saying it had nothing to do with you and it was his business. But two nights before his crash, Hyde called me and we talked about Chicago."_

"What? Michael, what are you talking about? You never told me you and Steven talked about that."

"_Yeah, Hyde said he'd kick my ass if I told you. But seeing as how he doesn't remember, I don't see why it has to be a secret anymore."_

"Well…what did he say?"

"_Not a lot, really. He just kept asking what you and I talked about while driving there. He asked whether you seemed actually upset or was just faking. He asked if we did anything and who started it."_

"Michael…" Jackie growled in warning.

"_Don't worry. I told him we didn't actually do anything. And if we were gonna, it wasn't your fault."_

"Damn it, Michael. He didn't need to know—"

"_Yeah, he did Jackie. He needs to know everything. Just like you need to know everything. Look, he grilled me with questions about you two days before he went out and tried to get divorced to the stripper. Doesn't that tell you anything?"_

"Michael, I…" Jackie sighed, feeling exhausted as her resolve crumbled away.

"_Look, I'm not saying you should go run into his arms or anything. You guys are a long way away from that since you've got a lot of crap to deal through. But don't leave yet just because you think he might hurt you again, all right? Especially when I really think he won't."_

Jackie groaned and a long silence followed. Finally... "Crap."

"_Good. I gotta go, 'kay?"_

"Okay. Tell Brooke I said hi. And give Betsy a kiss for me."

"_I will. Bye, Jackie."_

"Goodbye, Michael."

o-o-o

Four Minutes Later

"Hello?"

"_You meddling lumberjack. I'm gonna kill you."_

A smile slowly spread across Donna's face at the resignation she heard in Jackie's voice. "Did it…"

She heard Jackie groan. _"Yes, it worked. Which is why I'm gonna kil—Donna! Are you even listening to me?!"_

Donna paused her happy dance. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do your best, midget." With that, Donna hung up the phone and ran out the door. Hyde needed to know he still had a chance.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>**: **Thanks for reading! Please review-they make my day :)


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note: **Thank you, everyone, for your kind words. They keep me going :)

* * *

><p><em>November 3, 1978<em>

_6:23 p.m._

_Hyde was watching TV when he heard the 'clack-clack-clack' of heels against the cement stairs leading down to the basement. He knew who it was before he heard the door open, close, and then a singular curse in a feminine voice—a voice that still haunted his nightmares. He looked over and saw her jaw tighten when she realized there was nobody else in the basement—no buffers. Just her, unprepared and in enemy territory. He looked back at the TV, his expression dismissive. "What do you want?"_

"_I…umm…nothing. I just got off work and wanted to hang out. Is Donna here?"_

_Hyde grinned slowly. "Nope. She's out with my wife. Shopping." He looked over to gauge her reaction, his smile widening at the shock and anger he saw. _

_Jackie grimaced and tried to mask her hurt with a brave face, but he could read her from a mile away. "I hope that vapid whore doesn't convince Donna to buy any of those slutty clothes she seems to favor. Donna's got more class than that."_

"_Just because you're a prude, babe, doesn't mean everyone else has to be."_

_The door slammed and Hyde turned back towards the TV, keeping his expression blank as he tried to not focus on the look of hurt that crossed Jackie's face before she stormed out._

* * *

><p>February 25, 1979<p>

10:10 a.m.

Hyde jerked awake and immediately worked to focus on his surroundings—an exercise the doctor had recommended to battle the disorientation he would feel from being misplaced in his own timeline. Hyde looked around and saw he was in his own room, alone. After almost two weeks, he had started to get used to the greyness of his room again. No lavender-scented candles. No soft pillows and plush blankets. No twinkle lights.

Just a dull, grey room in the basement. Nothing more; nothing less.

He closed his eyes and worked to remember the vestiges of his dream before they slipped away, so dead-set was he on keeping ahold of anything that might flash at him from somewhere hidden in his mind.

As he remembered his own cold satisfaction from cruel words and the look of anger that crossed Jackie's face, he started to wonder if he even wanted to hold on to these memories he found so precious. He was sure they were memories since they so tangible—he could still remember the sound of the television as they talked and the clacking of her heels on the cement. In a way, he appreciated each moment he was presented with during fretful dreams in his sleep since they slowly connected him to a missing part of his life, but he equally hated them as if they were a punishment. They came in fragments and only a couple of nights a week, but in the ones he'd gathered so far, too many spoke of a life he was already reminded of daily—a life where he screwed up the best thing that had ever happened to him.

Hyde got up and stretched, finally remembering Donna's excitement from the day before. She'd gotten Kelso to convince Jackie to stay. Though Hyde wasn't too happy with Kelso being the only one Jackie would listen to—now knowing the events of Chicago—he would take all he could get at this point. Still, it left Hyde with a familiar feeling he'd been battling for two years now: jealousy. A feeling he knew he'd have to work on if he had any hope of getting Jackie back.

Hyde smiled at that thought. He did have hope though—she was staying.

o-o-o

28 Minutes Later

"Oh, good. You're up," Mrs. Forman said when Hyde entered the kitchen. "Here's your mail from yesterday since you were so busy. I forgot to give it to you before I went to work." She handed him a few envelopes and kissed him on the cheek. "Go sit down and have some pancakes."

Hyde sat and piled pancakes onto his plate, dousing them in butter and syrup. He was already a quarter-way through the stack before he came across it: a letter from the state's records office. "Holy crap, man. This is it!" He opened it quickly, ready to be finally be rid of the stripper, when cold dread started to make its way through his bloodstream as he read the words on the page. "Shit."

"Steven!"

"Shit!" he exclaimed again as he stood to leave. "I'll be back in a bit, Mrs. Forman. I gotta talk to Donna." He turned to look at her. "_Don't_ tell anyone."

With that, he left—his pancakes uneaten and the rest of his mail unopened. Kitty walked over and picked up the letter Hyde had crumpled in his fist before tossing onto the table. She flattened it and read the contents within.

"Oh, my…"

o-o-o

Ludlow Felderman, _Records Clerk II_  
>State Vital Records Office<br>Division of Public Health  
>Wisconsin Department of Health Services<br>P.O. Box 334  
>Madison, WI 53710<p>

February 23, 1979

Steven J. Hyde  
>4385 Colonial Ct.<br>Point Place, WI 53104

Dear Mr. Hyde,

We regret to inform you that your request for a divorce has been denied under the conditions with which you applied. Upon further investigation into your request, it appears your marriage is designated as a _void_ classification under state law as the second party on your request, Samantha Hyde, is already legally married to a Laurence Leonard in the State of Nevada. We cannot process your request with this new information.

If you have any questions, please feel free to contact me via the information as stated above.

Respectfully,

Ludlow Felderman

o-o-o

15 Minutes Later

Donna paced the length of her room back and forth, silent in contemplation except for the few times she'd pause and look at Hyde, open her mouth to say something, and then clamp it shut and resume her pacing.

Eventually, she stopped and turned towards him. "So, you guys were never…"

"Nope."

"But you thought…"

"Yep."

"Which ultimately means you…"

Hyde looked up from his spot on her chair. "Left Jackie for nothing? Yep."

Donna collapsed on her bed. "Wow."

Hyde sighed. "I need more words, man. Preferably ones that will tell me how I can fix this."

"I'm…not so sure that's possible. Fixing that, I mean. You just gotta tell her."

Hyde rolled his eyes. "Well, I know that. I'm talkin' how, here. I mean…how the hell am I gonna tell Jackie the marriage I stole from her was never actually legal when I don't even remember marrying the chick in the first place? You remember shit I can't. Give me something to work with here."

Donna blew out a breath. "Quickly. And preferably with something hard in front of you…protection against anything she'll wanna throw at you."

Hyde looked at her, unimpressed. "Really? Just go over there and throw out, 'Jackie, my marriage to Samantha was never legal,' behind a door? You have to have something better than that. I'm supposed to go over there in a few hours, man."

Donna looked at him as if he'd suddenly grown two heads. "You wanna tell her today? I… are you sure? It's your first meeting since she agreed to stay. Shit, it's only your second real one since you woke up. Everything's a little…sensitive right now."

"You _just_ told me I gotta tell her."

"Yeah. On steadier ground, Hyde. Maybe after she's done undoing all that packing and is set to stay for good."

"Who knows how long that'll take."

"Look, I know you guys gotta start…" Donna paused, trying to find the right word. "…_differently_ than you did before. No more hurting and lying and ultimatums. I get that. But you also have to _start_. And telling her something like that _today_ could kill that chance."

Hyde sighed, knowing that she was right and hating it all the same. He _never _wanted to lie to Jackie. She had gotten enough of that for a lifetime from Kelso. He wanted to be different. To be good for her.

"Don't think of it as lying, Hyde. And definitely don't think of it as protecting. That'll just piss her off. She deserves to know everything, and she will. Just give it time."

"Time." He nodded. "Thanks again, man."

Donna grinned. "No problem. Good luck."

o-o-o

February 25, 1979

3:44 p.m.

Hyde pulled in to the lot of Jackie and Fez's apartment building and killed the engine. He wanted to show up a little early to…something. Whatever it was, it wasn't working, because he was still too nervous for what was about to happen.

Since waking up and realizing his life had gone to shit, it was like something else inside him woke up. He just _knew_ he had to fix everything and get back his girl. Everyone had mentioned his new resolve. Donna flashed a grin at each mention of him and Jackie. Mrs. Forman would giggle and hug him whenever he even said the name _Jackie_. Red called his new attitude "commendable." Even his dad said he was proud of him.

He was slightly uncomfortable with the attention, but Hyde couldn't switch off this new determination he felt even if he tried. Besides, anything was better than just sitting and being miserable in hell. What he was fighting for…it was too good. And way too worth it to just walk away from again, even if he couldn't remember doing so the first time.

He got out of his car and made his way up the stairs to the apartment he'd only been to once with Fez a few days ago, his heart pounding the entire time. But he focused on one image: Jackie, with a grin on her face and eyes shining with tears of happiness, throwing herself at him. He'd do anything to make sure that wasn't just a distant memory anymore, but a constant reality.

Hyde took a deep breath and knocked on the door three times. He counted to twelve beats of his rioting heart before the door swung open—though not by the person expected.

"Fez."

"Hey," Fez said, jerking his head inside. "Come in. She's in the bedroom."

"Okay," Hyde said slowly, wondering if he was supposed to just walk in there. An action like that seemed too soon somehow.

"She's been crying off and on all day, but she knows you're here. Just wait out here, okay? She'll come out when she's ready."

Hyde nodded and sat at the couch, only to get up two seconds later and start pacing.

"Good luck," Fez said with a smile on his way out as he shut the door behind him.

Hyde nodded at him once and resumed his pacing, counting to twenty-two before he started to get sick of his own nervousness. He felt twitchy like Forman.

He pulled out one of the stools and sat, imagining Red's voice as he did so: _Men don't pace back and forth like dumbasses. Men sit down and wait out their punishment. So sit down and wait, dumbass!_

So Hyde sat and waited.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Rest assured, I am working steadily on a very heavy chapter 12. There'll be lot of feelings and a lot of dialogue. Please review!

Oh, I did some digging around and the name of the Vital Records office and the department it's in are legit...but Ludlow and the addresses aren't. Don't try and send a letter to either of them, since I have _no _idea where they'd end up. Thanks!


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's Note:** I apologize for the wait, you guys. This chapter just kept growing and re-formatting itself. It got so long that I've decided to split it. This is the first part. And I'm actually thinking I'll have to split the "second-half" because it turns out these two have more to hash out than I'd even anticipated. Ha. But here it is!

* * *

><p>Previously:<p>

"_She's been crying off and on all day, but she knows you're here. Just wait out here, okay? She'll come out when she's ready."_

…

_So Hyde sat and waited._

* * *

><p>42 Minutes Later<p>

February 26, 1979

4:37 p.m.

Hyde looked up quickly when he heard the bedroom door open and watched Jackie appear. He took in her splotched cheeks and red, searching eyes. She stopped short upon seeing him.

"You're still here."

He thought about not answering but a memory popped up.

"_No! No, a shrug's not gonna cut it! Steven, I need you to say something…" _

He looked at her and held her gaze. "You're worth it," he said softly.

Her head dropped as a pained expression came across her face. She took two deep breaths, then, "Thank you."

Those two little words and the soft, almost shy way in which she said them made Hyde want to open his mouth and tell her every thought and feeling he'd ever had about her.

He had always _known_ what he'd had when he'd had her, but as it turns out…he should have let her know he knew that too. Maybe they would have ended up differently and not here in this room filled to the brim with pain and tension. Hyde searched his mind for something to say when his gaze landed on one of the boxes strewn about the room—boxes he'd been eyeing heavily for the past forty-five minutes. "You haven't unpacked."

"No."

"Jackie…I'm really trying here."

She nodded her head. "I know."

"I don't really know what you want though."

Jackie ignored his unspoken question. Instead, she took a deep breath, rolled her shoulders back, and walked confidently over to the couch. He watched her as she took her time to sit. He smiled softly at the way she'd brush imaginary lint off of her skirt. She was a strong girl putting on a brave face—he just didn't like that he was the one causing it.

"Look, Steven, I know a lot of this isn't fair to you. I mean, you don't really know what happened so it doesn't make sense for me to be mad at you. But," she said, pausing as she turned towards him, "I have been here. I do remember everything. And I can't just forget all of that and give you what you want." She shrugged a shoulder. "But you do deserve time to figure out everything. I can give you some time, Steven. But I can't promise more than that. So, no. I haven't unpacked yet. It took too long to do it the first time and I don't wanna do it all over again when…this…is finished."

His stomach dropped. "Finished."

She nodded, unable to look him in the eye.

"You're already done with me."

Jackie sighed. "I'm not done with you, Steven. I'm here, right? We're here. I'm just…done hurting."

"I'm not gonna hurt you, baby."

She shook her head slowly. "You don't know that."

"What are you talking about? Of cours—"

"No, Steven. You don't. You don't know what you've said or done. You don't know how it's been for me these past few months." Jackie dropped her gaze and spoke softly. "I would watch you with her. Your eyes would follow her around the room when she had on those slutty outfits. You would grin and hike your eyebrows when she'd call you to your room. I remember how you'd run after her. I remember the noises." Tears fell down her face and her gaze unfocused with each awful memory. "Remember when you said you hated my perfect memory? We got in that fight over Michael and 'get off my boyfriend' and I reminded you about that girl from the record store. You said you wish I didn't have to remember every little thing."

He nodded, solemnly.

"Me too now. 'Cause I remember with perfect detail every moment you burned me, reminding me all the time that I was a snotty, stuck-up bitch with no job and no boyfriend."

Hyde flinched at the harsh words that left her mouth, words that were laced with pain. A pain he didn't know—not entirely. But he could feel it coming off her in waves and now dreaded the idea of those lost memories coming back to him.

"I remember how I'd burn you back. How hurting each other became a routine. I remember when I'd start to expect glares from you, instead of those little smiles I used to get."

Hyde expelled a breath. "Jesus."

Jackie looked up at him. "So, no. You can't know that you won't hurt me again, because you don't know what it felt like to do it before."

"That's not true."

She looked at him and Hyde saw a touch of apprehension in her gaze, as if she were afraid he'd burn her now. It was in that moment he realized something: she _really_ didn't trust him. He knew he'd have to fix that, even if it ruined his chances in the process.

"It's not the same," he said slowly, not wanting to scare her off. "We were kids and before anything ever happened, but I do remember what it was like when we hated each other, doll. I remember how easy it was to burn you. And I remember how easy it was for you to burn me and then run off with Kelso. But it never felt good. Even then."

She sighed. "I know that, Steven. But don't you see? That's what made it harder. I had to keep reminding myself that deep down, you didn't really mean all those horrible words you threw at me every day. It was the only thing that would get me through. But…even then…" She looked down, but continued softly. "You did it so easily. You'd call me a bitch and not flinch. I remember when you punched a guy for calling me that."

"He was a dillhole."

She smiled briefly.

"Don't be done with me yet, Jackie. Even though I did all of that crap I can't remember. Just…don't be done. Okay?"

Jackie collapsed into the couch, already feeling exhausted after just ten minutes of conversation with the man who'd broken her heart. A man who looked at her in the type of way she'd almost forgotten he was capable of. He was here. _Her _Steven. And yet, memory after memory of his cold, spiteful gaze trained on her wouldn't leave her mind's eye.

"Look," he said when she didn't answer. "I know I probably shouldn't bring this up, but there's something I need to tell you." He glanced again at all the boxes all over the room and blocked Donna's voice out of his head. "Even though I know you're gonna be mad at me. But you deserve to know."

o-o-o

_Meanwhile…_

"What are you doing?" Kitty asked upon entering her kitchen and finding Donna furiously mixing a bowl of ingredients, a dusting of white flour on her left sleeve, her pants, and sprinkled on the tops of her shoes.

"Making muffins."

"She is too nervous," Fez said from his spot at the kitchen table.

"Nervous…oh. Are they…right now?"

Fez nodded. "I left him over there about an hour ago. I don't think she's killed him yet. Too soon."

"You don't think he'd tell her, right?" Donna asked as she grabbed muffin tins from the cupboard. "I mean…right?"

"About his fake marriage?" Kitty asked.

Donna nodded, continuing to mix the contents of the bowl with furious, furtive movements. A bit flew out of the bowl and landed on the kitchen counter, making Kitty apprehensive over state of her kitchen if she didn't step in.

"Steven was never good at lying," Kitty said, grabbing cupcake liners and handing them to Donna before grabbing a washcloth and wiping the counter. "But if he decides to tell her, then that will be his choice. You can't make it for him."

Donna groaned. "But he's such an idiot and way too good at screwing something like that up. If he does tell her, she's gonna kill him." She turned to Fez. "Should we check on them?"

"Are you kidding? It'll be like a battle zone. You don't just walk in there unannounced and without protection. Jackie'll kill you right after she kills Hyde. Ooh, maybe we should borrow Red's gun."

"You're not borrowing Red's anything," Kitty admonished, reaching in the cupboard to grab the flour. "Now, Donna, help me make some cookies. Steven and Jackie will need some food later after all that yelling."

o-o-o

Jackie shook her head back and forth as she read the letter once, twice, and then a third time—each word more painful than the last. Tears streamed down her face and she finally looked up at Hyde. He was looking at her so intensely, studying her face to gauge her reaction. His eyebrows were furrowed in worry but Jackie didn't care. She saw red.

"How could you?" she whispered furiously.

"Jackie…I'm so—"

"How could you do this to us?!" Jackie shouted, ignoring his attempts to apologize. She looked back at the letter and continued shaking her head in disbelief. "You flushed us down the drain for that _disgusting _slut. You made me feel like shit for _months_, telling me as many times as you could in as many hurtful ways as possible that we were nothing compared to what you had with _her_. I had to listen to you screwing her! I had to listen to Donna tell me how great she was and watch Fez fawn all over her whenever she was in the room. And now you tell me your marriage wasn't even real?!"

Hyde looked down, hating himself more than he'd ever had before.

"You took away the _one_ thing I wanted, shoved it in my face as many times as you could, and now you're telling me all it took to ruin everything was one drunk night and some deceitful bitch who snuggled up to you? _Look at me__!_"

Hyde looked up, surprised at her outburst.

"The worst thing is," Jackie said as she held his gaze, "you were okay with it. You embraced her. She was _your wife _after all, right?" With that, Jackie dropped the paper and walked to her bedroom, slamming the door shut and leaving Hyde defeated, once again.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note<strong>: Please tell me what you thought! More will be up...and soon! I promise!


	13. Chapter 13

**Author's Note: **Like I said, the "second half" would most likely be split into two, again. And it was. Here's the first part-haha. Enjoy! :)

* * *

><p>February 26, 1979<p>

5:28 p.m.

"No, sweetie. They need to be the same size or they won't bake evenly. Like those ones over there." Kitty nodded when Donna pinched off a bit of the raw cookie dough in her hand and put it back in the bowl. "Yes, better."

"I always hated this part."

"Me too. I usually got Eric to do it. He's always had such nimble fingers."

"I love this part!" Fez said, his mouth full.

Donna snorted. "One, you aren't doing anything. Two, you only like it 'cause you're eating all the dough."

The harsh ringing of the telephone cut off Fez's reply and everyone in the kitchen paused. Fez and Donna looked at each other, then at Mrs. Forman.

"I told her we'd be here," Fez said.

Kitty nodded. "Well, answer it before Red does."

Donna wiped off her hands and took a deep breath before walking over, picking it up on the sixth ring. "Hello?"

She heard a sniffle and a small sob, then, _"It was fake. He left me for that whore and it wasn't even real."_

Donna sighed and then cursed softly. "Oh, Jackie."

"_Why did he do this to me?"_

The sad desperation in Jackie's voice caused Donna to tear up too, but she wiped them away angrily with her sleeve. She had to be strong for Jackie. "A lot of reasons, Jackie. Not all of them were good."

She heard Jackie snort in disgust. _"Were any of them good?"_

"You know they were, Jackie. He's a good guy. He was just trying to do the right thing."

"_He should have done the right thing by me. Not her."_

"I know. I know."

"_It's so not fair. I was with him through everything and then all of a sudden she comes in and automatically matters more."_

"She's never mattered more, Jackie. You know that."

"_Do I?"_

"Of course you do. He's there trying to repair a relationship with _you_, isn't he? I mean, yeah, she's a factor in your downfall, but not the whole story. If you wanna go forward with this, you can't focus on her or their fake marriage. You gotta focus on the good stuff. You gotta remember that you and Hyde had problems before she showed up. You gotta remember that, according to what she told us, she had nowhere to go and they were legally bound to each other. You gotta remember that he would never just abandon her and throw her out on the street, just like he didn't abandon you with prom and Kelso and your mom taking off to Mexico." Donna paused and sighed. "You gotta remember he's a good guy and just does really stupid things sometimes."

Donna still heard soft sniffles but no response, so she kept going. "And you gotta remember that he really, really cares about you. He wouldn't be doing all of this if he didn't. He's been trying to fix something he doesn't even remember breaking in the first place. And if you want him, then you have to let him try, Jackie."

Donna heard nothing but silence, and then a sigh. Jackie's voice was soft and quiet when she spoke. _"I really missed you."_

Donna grinned and wiped more tears away. "I missed you too, midget. And I missed him, funnily enough. Didn't you?"

"_Yeah. He looks at me in that way, you know? I'd almost forgotten what that felt like."_

Donna smiled. "Be strong. But be fair too. Okay?"

"_Yeah."_ She heard a sigh. _"Okay. Thanks."_

After Jackie hang up the phone, Donna blew out a long breath. She felt a hand on her back rubbing in circles and a cookie was handed to her. "Thanks, Mrs. Forman."

"You deserve it, sweetie."

o-o-o

Jackie hung up the phone and grabbed another tissue, dabbing her wet eyes and looking at the small pile that had formed around her. She groaned at herself in disgust and gathered them all up, throwing them in the trash with a little more force than was necessary.

_Be strong_, Donna had said. But Jackie didn't feel strong. She felt weak and fragile, proven by the piles of tear-soaked tissues she'd just tossed. She thought she couldn't feel any more pain than she'd been feeling these past few months, but nothing could have prepared her for this. She felt like she was being pulled in so many different directions, each one more confusing than the other.

Jackie sighed and flopped back on her bed. As she lay there, she thought heavily about Donna's words and came to a few conclusions. One, the man out there was hurting as much as she was. And it wasn't doing either of them any favors to keep punishing him for something he didn't remember doing in the first place. Two, even if he could remember, it wasn't all of his fault anyway. Three, as much as she wanted to sometimes, Jackie knew she couldn't turn her back on him. And most importantly, four, Jackie ultimately didn't want to. She knew she had a second chance at happiness and wanted to take it.

But she deserved a voice this time. She deserved a say in _how _they would get there. No more ultimatums or jealousy or strippers. Just her and Steven. There'll probably be a lot of yelling and—Jackie grimaced—more crying, but she could be strong and fair and still get her happiness too. Jackie touched the simple, gold bracelet on her left wrist and smiled for the first time in weeks.

Just then, a piece of paper slipped under the door.

o-o-o

Ten minutes earlier

Hyde opened the medicine cabinet, looking for pain pills since his arm was killing him. He located some Tylenol and popped a couple in his mouth before closing the cabinet and looking at himself in the mirror.

He looked like shit.

Hyde sighed and turned on the faucet, rinsing the pills down with the cool water. He scrubbed his face while he was at it, taking relief in the cool temperature against his heated skin.

Jackie had disappeared into her room over twenty minutes ago and Hyde felt sick over everything she said. And the look on her face… he could only describe it betrayal. She had trusted him with everything and he exploited it.

It didn't even matter anymore that he couldn't remember anything. Her pain was enough for him to take the blame. He had fucked up, royally, and didn't know if a chance was still to be had.

Hyde walked back into the living room and he saw the letter on the floor. He stared at it, hating how one piece of paper could have the potential to ruin everything, when an idea occurred to him. He picked it up and flipped it over before searching the apartment for a pen.

* * *

><p><em>Jackie,<em>

_When I woke up in the hospital, I looked for you. See, I thought I was still living this great life. I thought I still had my chick. I looked for you, but you weren't there. I expected chocolate and flowers and the smell of your shampoo, but I got Donna and Kelso instead. And then over the next few hours, I realized why. It's because I screwed up, doll. Because we both screwed up—but mostly me. _

_You know I had a pretty shitty life growing up. I was never told I was worth anything until I came to live with the Formans. I never started to believe them until I got with you. But even then, all those words still felt too sappy anyway. And kind of empty. I mean, I'd watched Kelso say to you everything you'd wanted to hear, and then cheat on you an hour later. Words were nothing. _

_I always figured if you felt it, you shouldn't have to say it. The other person should just know, you know? Turns out, I was wrong. I always thought you knew, but I love you, doll. And I'm not saying it now because I'm afraid of losing you, like the first and only time I did before. I'm not saying it now because I think you hate me and I can't stand the thought of that. I'm not saying it to apologize. I'm saying it because I feel it. Because I've always felt it. _

_I should have expected your reaction to what's on the other side of this letter. And I could have waited to tell you until we were 'on steadier ground' – Donna's words, not mine. But you don't deserve to be lied to, baby. If you want me, then you're gonna have to want all of me. Including all the stupid shit I've done in the past, like give you up and get fake-married to some stripper from Vegas. And you'll have to want me for every stupid thing I'm gonna do in the future._

_Because I want you. So I'll be out here. Waiting._

* * *

><p>Jackie stared down at the letter, both elated and in shock. So much emotion was coursing through her that she could barely breathe. And though she kept thinking she should take this with a grain of salt, she pushed those thoughts aside for the moment so she could just re-read and enjoy her favorite parts.<p>

_He loved her_. Even from well before he had said it the first time, she'd always known he felt this way. But seeing the words on the page in his handwriting left her giddy with happiness.

And just as suddenly as the elation came, it was doused with a sudden memory of his cold, hard gaze trained on her that flashed before her mind's eye.

* * *

><p><em>December 22, 1978<em>

_6:36 p.m._

_Jackie walked into the Formans' living room, unprepared for the sight before her. She'd been hoping to find Mr. Forman—there was a leaky pipe at her apartment and her roommate and landlord just weren't the men to take care of it—and walked in on Steven instead, with the whore sitting right in his lap. And not just sitting. Making out. They were unrestrained and almost animalistic in their movements, practically getting it on in the middle of the living room, and it made Jackie sick. She tried to back up slowly and remain unnoticed, but she bumped into the bookcase and swore at the sudden pain in her shoulder blade. _

_Hyde's lips ripped away from the blonde's at the sound and his gaze made a quick pass at Jackie before dismissing her just as easily. "Didn't your mother ever tell you it was rude to stare?" he asked with a sardonic grin before pulling Sam's face towards his own again. _

_Jackie realized with a start how much power Steven still had over her, because with one simple sentence, he not only reminded Jackie of every crappy memory she'd ever had of her mom, but he reminded her of one of her worst memories of Steven—when he had walked in on the floozy drunken woman topless and neglected to tell her. Instead, he had seemed eager to keep the whole incident to himself. To relive the memory, no doubt. _

_Jackie grimaced and shut her eyes, remembering how much that hurt, how insecure he had made her feel. How many other women in various state of undress had Steven seen, and had he liked the sight of all of them as much as he had liked of Pam? _

_Jackie forced those thoughts away though. Instead of dwelling on what once was, she took a deep breath and walked out of the room with her head held high, resolved to forget this even happened and keep looking for her intended target instead: Red with tools. She had a leaky sink to fix, after all._

_She never caught the way Hyde kept his gaze on her the whole time, or how he had forcefully pushed Sam away and off his lap the second the door had swung shut behind the brunette._

* * *

><p>February 26, 1979<p>

5:43 p.m.

Jackie groaned, hating how conflicted she felt. Every good moment she had experienced in the past few weeks was tainted with a memory of an equally awful moment from the previous months. Jackie knew what she wanted, but the notion of just forgetting everything that had happened was nothing short of laughable. There were too many: too many horrible memories, too many tears, too many words she wished neither of them had said.

She groaned again. But of course they couldn't go unsaid. Everything that had happened couldn't just go away, no matter how much she wanted it to. If there was any hope for her and Steven, they would have to move forward, together, with complete honesty, holding nothing back. She looked back down at the letter in her hands. After all, if he was willing to do that for her, then she could do the same for him.

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>As always, thank you so much for reading and please leave a review!


	14. Chapter 14

**Author's Note: **Who here wants to hear about how I had to split the chapter again? No? Nobody? All right. Read on!

* * *

><p>February 26, 1979<p>

6:03 p.m.

When Jackie finally walked out of her bedroom, she once again found the scene before her different than she'd imagined. Hyde wasn't on the sofa making out with a gross stripper this time though. He wasn't sitting on the stool he had been occupying, or even in the living room. He was in the kitchen, opening and shutting cabinets, and rifling through drawers. He had also put a record on and Jackie listened carefully to figure out who was coming out of her stereo.

With all the hours she had spent in Steven's room in the basement, she knew the name would come eventually. And it did: Lynyrd Skynyrd. It was actually one of the albums she had taken from him after they'd broken up. She'd figured with all they'd been through, she deserved a parting gift.

With the music and the banging around though, Hyde had never even notice her leave the room. Instead of immediately announcing her presence, she took advantage of this rare opportunity and watched him silently from her side of the room.

She remembered the days when she would come to the restaurant at the hotel and he would feed her whatever the special of the day was. She would sit at the table in the corner and watch him, loving how he moved—like he didn't give a shit what anyone thought. Which, of course, he probably didn't. Jackie grinned at the memory. He always knew when she was watching though. He'd catch her gaze and hike his eyebrows playfully, smirking when she would laugh. It was a side of him that nobody else saw; only her. And she treasured those moments.

And like clockwork, the sobering idea that that behavior—his playfulness, ease, and readiness to take care of someone else—_wasn't_ something he only reserved for her doused Jackie's happiness. In the preceding months before the accident, she could only stand to watch him interact with the stripper for so long before her heart clenched in pain and she'd have to look away. When they were together, her Steven only displayed that behavior when he was alone with her…did he do the same when alone with _her_?

She wished she could ask him. She wished she could ask him a lot of things, like whether he was playful with the whore, or if he cooked for her, or if he would always make sure and have music playing in the background—a quirk of Jackie's he had picked up on early and always fulfilled. But of course, she couldn't. Because the man in the kitchen wouldn't be able to tell her, as much as he might want to. It was just another reminder that they were coming into this from very different perspectives—he of hope and she of caution. It was a strange role reversal she wasn't quite used to.

Just then, he spotted her, and she watched with fascination at the myriad of expressions that crossed his face: surprise, concern, and that hope that continued to intrigue her. It was subtle, but she could see it in the intensity of his gaze.

"Hey."

"Hey," she said, walking slowly towards him, an eyebrow raised in question.

"I was gonna make you some cocoa. Do you still like hot cocoa?"

She would have answered him with a silent nod, but he was no longer looking at her. He would glance her way ever few seconds, but other than that, his focus was primarily on the cabinets and drawers he kept opening and closing.

"Yeah, I do. Thanks," she said, watching him avoid eye contact with her.

He nodded and set about gathering his supplies. His sudden off-putting behavior should have angered her, but she actually found it endearing. And enlightening. This is what her Steven was like after opening up his heart in such a big, wonderful way: wary and nervous. She probably could have guessed this was what she would see after leaving her room, but with him not opening up very often, she really couldn't have been sure.

It was a wonderful change, and Jackie hoped it would only be one of many.

She started walking towards him slowly, and as she passed the couch, he seemed to notice she was coming towards him. He stopped what he was doing and it was then she noticed how quickly he was breathing. Suddenly, with a flash of clarity, she realized something: in her efforts to not get hurt again, she had to have been killing him slowly over these past few weeks. He was terrified of another rejection.

Maybe it was time they stopped hurting each other.

"I want you too," she said softly.

o-o-o

_Meanwhile_

"Do you really think they're going to eat _all _of these cookies, Mrs. Forman?" Donna asked, eyeing the dozens of snickerdoodles, chocolate chip, and oatmeal raisin cookies cooling off around the kitchen, along with her lonely batch of brownies in the corner—a square already cut out and consumed by Fez.

"Of course not, silly. We're only going to give them that tray over there."

"Those are the good ones!" Fez interjected from the kitchen table. "They are much larger and softer than the rest."

"Which is why Steven and Jackie deserve them." Kitty turned to Donna. "I was going to give those," she said, pointing to two trays resting on the top of the fridge, "to you and your dad. I thought we could package up some and send them to Eric and Michael too."

Donna smiled. "That sounds great."

o-o-o

With her words, genuine hope started to trickle through his veins for the first time since he had woken up to find his world on its axis and everything falling apart.

"But I'm still mad at you," she added. "And honestly, I'm wondering if I can forgive you for everything you did. But also…"

And along with that hope came the cold dose of reality. "You don't trust me."

Jackie dropped her gaze and slowly shook her head. "I can't."

"You will."

Jackie continued towards him. "You're so sure. I don't get how you can be so sure."

He watched her move towards him, distinctly aware that this is the closest she's been willing to be near him since he woke up. Every nerve in his body fired up and his ears grew hot. After a moment's hesitation where she cast him a scared glance and chewed on her lip, she leaned into his side and his arm automatically folded around her.

He hoped to hell and back that she couldn't feel how hard his heart was pounding, but then he realized he didn't care. She was probably more scared anyway.

He closed his eyes as he held her, taking in how well she fit and the smell of her shampoo when he felt wetness on his shirt. He looked down and saw tears streaming down her face as she pressed herself tight against him. This time, however, instead of the perpetual frown that she'd been wearing, there was a small smile.

Her voice was so soft, he almost had to strain to hear her over the blood pumping in his ears. "You're not pushing me away."

He held her closer. "No," he said, almost as softly. "No."

o-o-o

"Do they even allow cookies in Africa?" Donna asked aloud as she stood over the kitchen table, using tongs to select the best and softest cookies and drop them in the plastic bag.

"They better let my baby have his snickerdoodles or they won't know what hit them," Kitty said, assembling turkey sandwiches and wrapping them up.

"Ookay," Donna said, sharing a grin with Fez and dropping two more snickerdoodles in the bag. "Hey, where are the brownies? I want to send Eric a piece."

"Ummm…"

"Oh, you're kidding."

"I was hungry!"

"Fez!"

o-o-o

Hyde held Jackie tightly, happy that she was in his arms again. "I'm sorry, baby," he whispered, thinking about all she'd said earlier.

To his surprise, Jackie stiffened and flinched before backing away.

"What?" he asked, watching as the smile on her face morphed into wariness once again.

She shook her head. "Nothing. You just…reminded me I can't get too comfortable yet."

Hyde looked at her in confusion as he searched his mind for any reason why she'd back away when he tried to apologize, and his mind picked something out—a dream he'd only had that morning.

_Just because you're a prude, babe, doesn't mean everyone else has to be._

"Babe," he said, studying her reaction to that word. Just as he'd guessed, she looked up suddenly, fear in her eyes.

He nodded slowly in understanding, never taking his eyes off of her. "I twisted it, didn't I?"

"How did you…"

"I've been having dreams. They're always really quick, not always good. You're in almost all of them."

"What happens?"

Hyde blew out a breath, trying to remember everything that happened. It seemed like the more he thought about it, though, the more it tried to fly away. "There was one this morning… I remember you walked into the basement and asked where Donna was. You said something about slutty outfits, and then I called you a prude. But I called you…"

"Babe."

He looked at her in question.

"It wasn't a dream. It was a memory. And it wasn't the first time you'd said it, but I remember how…" she sighed and sat back on the couch.

"Tell me," Hyde implored of her, wanting everything on the table, unpleasant as it may be.

She looked up at him. "I remember how pleased you were with trying to hurt me. I used to love it when you called me that. And then you turned it into this thing," she said, sadly, her gaze unfocused. "Another way to hurt me, I guess, by tainting what was once good…by reminding me that I was foolish to love you."

"Jackie…"

Jackie groaned and collapsed on the sofa, her head in her hands. "Maybe this was a mistake."

o-o-o

"I don't feel so good."

"Well, you ate a tray and a half of cookies and all of my brownies. I'm not surprised, idiot."

"Ai! Do not mock me. It was stress eating."

"Speaking of," Kitty said from her place at the counter as she filled a plastic bag with cookies, sandwiches, and two pieces of Donna's brownies, "would one of you bring these over to them?"

"We can both go. I'll drive and you bring them up."

Fez nodded pathetically, his hands splayed on his protruding stomach.

"You better not barf in the car, though."

"No promises."

Donna looked over at Mrs. Forman in worry.

"I'll…just grab a few extra plastic bags to take with you."

"Good plan. We can stop by Fatso Burger too."

"Oh, good. French fries will calm my stomach down."

Donna grinned, shaking her head at her friend. "Amazing."

"Hey," Fez said, his face serious. "They're gonna get through this. Right?"

"I hope so." Donna smiled at Mrs. Forman as she took the bags from her. "I really hope so."

* * *

><p><strong>Author's Note: <strong>Another heavy, dialogue-filled chapter to look forward to. Please review!


End file.
